gail

Sandy S. I buzzed my hair in late November, and took off my hate in late March. (Chemo was done the last week in january). My hair was very, very short, but it was too hot for a hat. Then, about a month or so after that, it became quite curly for the first time ever. Unfortunately, it did not stay that way. My tip for hair loss--- buy lots of really cool earrings!

I too believe in the "better living through chemistry", as Judy B. mentioned.

Reaching out for support is so vital to dealing with this. When I had my first dx, I didn't discuss it with anyone, the second, somewhat, but I didn't include my feelings. With the lung cancer, I pulled out all stops and had everyone willing to help around. It is a terrifying time, no doubt. My son was 7 with my first diagnosis. Try to take little baby steps--one thing at a time. You do not have to solve it all today. We're here for to help all we can. After this last cancer, I went on anti-depressents and am seeing a therapist who specializes in cancer. I also take COQ-10. Find a good health food store and talk to them. Hugs to you all

I had chemo with my second breast cancer. My hair started to fall out when I was in my classroom teaching. I went to tuck a piece away, and it came out in my hand. I walked right out of the room, and went next door to tell my friend. I was devasted and inconsoloble. Someone reminded me that I knew my hair was going to fall out, but that really doesn't make a difference when it happens. I went to the hair dresser's that night and got my head shaved. Then I took an ativan, and life was fine. The initail shock is bad. Then I started looking at the NBA and all their shaved heads. Remind you dad it's the in thing!

Statistics are just numbers. Only God knows when it's time. I have reminded myself over and over again. Stay with us. This is a wonderful place.

You guys go for it!!! I will send warm thoughts your way. gail

It's alright to hide once in a while! I think the ice cream sounds good!

Kathy, this is all still very new for you. You sound like you are somewhere between shock and anger/depression. It's natural in the grieving process. You are grieving the loss of your life as you knew it. But I am here to tell you there is life with cancer. We cancer people are just more aware of how fragile life can be. And we learn to value each day we have. So forget the statistics. They are just numbers. Remember too, what the statistics for things like auto accidents are. God is the only one who decides, not anyone else. I found anti-anxiety and anti-depression medications helped tremendously, especially at the beginning of the diagnosis. And stay close to us and let us help. hugs and hugs and hugs and hugs gail

I always try to wait a little bit and let the decision come to me. My first breast CA, I was in no having chemo, the second time I knew I wanted it. I think you are still in the overwhelmed-shocked stage, and in a few days it will come clearer to you.

You will find a lot of friends here. Stay with us. This has been like a lifeline. I too, hated getting help. It took me a while to get past that. I knew through my surgery that when i was well, I would help others. And we do. So take the help now--you'll know when the time is right to pass it on. These days, as I step over my laundry, I smile about the ties I was relentless with getting it done and the house pciked up. Now we are more relaxed. We sit and enjoy each other's company. The cancer as well as 9/11 showed me that life is too precious.

I had radiation with my first breast cancer. I found that radiologist completely cold. He actually stood there and waited for me to take my top off. At that time I had no idea I was to be examined. It was a trying time, and he didn't help. Needless to say, I switched doctors too. We can only hope they learn.

I too, changed oncologists just prior to the discovery of my lung cancer. I felt like my first one was just waiting for the other shoe to drop. Don't need that kind of attitude. That office actually asked me, on one follow up visit, where they should send my blood. Now I had had chemo there, and many blood samples taken prior. I looked at them in shock and asked them where they had sent it the last time! I also went in twice for chemo and was sent home because my counts were too low. When I took a friend to another onc's initial vist, he told her to schedule all appointments now. I asked what if her counts were too low. He looked at me with surprise and said that he would give her procrit. He is now my oncologist.

I can handle the testing--it's the waiting afterwards for the phone call that gets me. I watch the phone everytime it rings. I had a few bad phone calls, so now I wait until I am at the comfort of my home to receive calls.

Yes, Abby, you can always scream. Just do it in a safe place. I think talking to the social worker is a great idea. Try calling the American Cancer Society also. They have programs where they drive patients to chemo and such. I called them when I was first diagnosed in 93. They were very helpful and comforting. I found 1-800-4CANCER helpful as well. Do you have a minister to talk with? With my last cancer, I spent time with him and that was helpful as well. Church brought me dinners. Stay on this site. We're here.

You will find a lot of people telling you about the surgery. It was not an easy surgery. I had a lobe removed 21 months ago. The drugs are the good part. He should stay on them through the hospital stay. I tried to avoid it, and my surgeon hollered at me. I gradually was weaned down, and actually off the pain killers within 3 weeks of being home. The important part for anyone going through surgery is to stay down and rest for the first 2 weeks. Trying to get moving too early will only delay recovery. Believe me, I learned the hard way. And I tell anyone going through recovery to 'PACE' yourself. Do a little, read a chapter. Do a little more, watch some TV. Life will not be normal for a while. But my surgery was in late April, and I was at the shore in early July, and visting Texas two weeks later. Read about hospital stay hints. Let us help.

I don't know when you were diagnosed, but I had those same feelings when I was first diagnosed in 93 with breast cancer. We had just put the house on the market; the day I learned of the diagnosis, we took it off. 8 months later we found a beautiful house, and life progressed. I think those fears are common and natural, because I had them with each of my three diagnosis. Talking with a therapist this last time really helped me to focus on the day, the present. We could spend our life waiting to see if it reoccurs, and then be killed in a car accident. Give yourself time. It's been 21 months since my lung cancer, and it's really only been since the fall that I've been starting to think about the future again. doesn't mean, though, that I'm not enjoying today. Smile each day gail

I agree with Cindy. We moms just want to do our mom stuff. I was home a week from my mastectomy and writing a big health report with my then 12 year old. I remember I had taken a nap, and saved my pain pill for that time. We want our life to be as normal as possible. And I also remember not wanting people lurking. I didn't like feeling that I was being watched. You can find a way to connect. Keep breathing.

Did you get a second opinion? When my lung nodule was found, my then current oncologist expressed a deep dismay that I really didn't want to hear. If I wanted dismay, I would have called my mother! When I asked my new oncologist about the same nodule, he was very matter of fact, and said "we'll treat it!" It's hard to keep running to doctors, but the right fit is important. Take slow deep breaths.

Who is following your case? My oncologist and I are best friends now. Every 3-4 months, also stage 1. I only see my surgeon twice a year. You can call and take your scans and go. I'd much rather see my onc then my surgeon.

The smoking doesn't really explain my 2 breast cancers. I was DES exposed, and after the LC, I really decided my DNA was screwed up. And that my body reacted to stress by growing tumors. That's why I'm finally seeing a therapist and taking Zoloft. Most days the cancer issue doesn't come up.

I'll pick up the ball. I read with interest all the posts. I find myself 21 months later, telling people, yes, I quit smoking 17 years prior to diagnosis of NSCLC. And that I had only smoked for 10 years, and less than a pack a day. And that I was an obnoxious non-smoker. I also inform them that my LC was the kind non-smokers get. And that Ozzie Nelson (Ozzie and Harriet) had died of lung cancer and had never in his life smoked. I want people to know this so they will not smoke. If this can happen to me, why increase the odds by smoking now? I am wondering who will be the first person I jump in the WAWA line buying cigarettes.

They told me I was very lucky that I was stage 1A. So why didn't I feel lucky? Why did this cancer send me into a tailspin? Because it was still cancer, it was deep inside my body, and I knew it only takes one sneaky cell to escape and find a new home somewhere in my body. And in my next breath, I always say I could be dead from a car accident too. I also hate the question "Did you smoke?" Yes, from 1974-1984. Less then a pack a day. I quit before I got pregnant. Didn't want to screw that up. I was an obnoxious non-smoker. HA. I know, non-smokers get lung cancer, and we need to remind people of that. So why do I feel like slapping the cigarette pack out of people's hands in the WAWA line?