glo

Love it TeeTaa. My husband always expressed it as "better to wear out than to rust out."

Add me to the list of those who have no qualms about where my donations go. Don't need a spreadsheet -- don't need a receipt. In the past I've donated and said use it for whatever LCSC needs -- was surprised to receive back one of Katie's neat tote bags with a receipt! I can't even begin to imagine how much of the Brown family income has gone into this site, let alone how much time! Please keep on keeping on, Katie.

Don - You're doing just fine. The Board has been my therapy too. Keep on looking inside and doing what you find right for you. She is YOUR mother. You can never satisfy everyone else no matter what you do. I think the memorial book is very thoughtful and if in the future you decide you want a service of some kind that's fine too. Just keep on keeping on. We're all very proud of you.

Gail, I'm so happy for you to have a weekend with your sisters. I also have four sisters -- and was amazed when in April they were ALL able to fly together from Maryland to California to spend 9 days with me. We had such a good time. It was truely therapeutic. Few people ever know you as well as your sisters do. And love you anyway I'm glad you are taking care of yourself.

Thanks for letting us get to know her, Don. She sounds like a great lady, which is no surprise after learning a lot about her son's character through your posts. You need not worry about how other family have reacted to no funeral. You asked what she wanted and then carried out her wishes. They are free to arrange a memorial service for her at any time or place they wish and if they invite you, you are free to attend or not attend. What you do with her ashes is up to you. They are not a necessary part of any memorial. There is no "right" or "wrong" in how a death is handled. Only what feels right to you. Hoping for more peace for you each day, Don.

Sorry you have a grumpy personality you don't like on the steroids, David. Hope you get relief soon. Karen, at least Faith didn't knock the L out of the keyboard.

Oh, they look too cute to be real, but I'm sure you can testify to the fact that they're 100% real. They're beautiful Rick and he looks so protective of her.

Joni - They're all right. It is shock. You may not really believe that now. I didn't recognize that I was in shock until it started wearing off. And a big part of my reactions was also how can the world be going on? Don't they know the universe has stopped? I'm sure you will be experiencing many emotions and all of them are normal. Grief is different for each person, but as you can read, we all seem to have a lot of feelings and reactions that are similar. Wishing you more peace each day.

You always make me laugh. You know God only made a few perfect heads. The rest he covered up with hair! Both you and your mom will be able to use that line. The Napoleon hat is so big nobody will know whether you have hair or not. Just keep the hat on. Gloria

That was my first impression, too, Fay. Reported for what? Well, long as it's not repotted! Good luck, David. Gloria

Great news Jack! I can read the excitement you're feeling. I'll be looking forward to her post. Gloria

Ah, Peggy - Great! The pain gone is so wonderful. It's so hard to watch them in pain that just doesn't let up and it's sad when the only antidotes to the pain seem to make the patient so groggy that the quality of life goes way down. So glad he's able to ride the bike and enjoy the outdoors! Treasure every precious day. Our days are numbered for all of us -- we just don't know the number -- thank goodness! Glad you and your husband are enjoying the day! Gloria

Robin - I'm so, so sorry for your loss. Gloria

Shirley - Adding my prayers that it's nothing. We all know there are many scares on the mammograms that turn out just fine, but until we get that report it's real scary. Wishing you the best. Feel free to PM. Gloria

Candy - I'm glad too to see you back posting. I've been concerned and asked if anyone had heard from you. Like Shirley, I can definitely relate to all you've talked about. It is certainly hard to do alone those things we always did with our husbands. I'm very proud of you for making the effort. Just keep on going -- we'll all make it eventually. Gloria

Well, heck, indeed! Sorry to hear this, Fay, but I know you're far from done fighting. Wishing you all the best. Shine on, nightlight! Gloria

Oh, Ginny - I wish I was close enough to do something to help you and Earl. I'm so sorry you have to go through this. You've both been so strong. ((((Ginny and Earl)))) Gloria

Goodnight, Fay! Love your humor. Gloria

That is a perfectly beautiful, wonderful tribute, Deb. I'm so sorry you lost him and glad you have so many beautiful memories. No, there aren't enough of them, but there never would be no matter how many years we have together. I know your Dad is still very proud of you. He remembers. Gloria

Ginny, I'm SO sorry that Earl is having some bad days. But don't forget to get enjoyment out of the fact that he is still with you, still recognizes you -- and the twinkle is still in there -- just gone a little deeper. My prayers go out to you both. Gloria

Prayers coming right away. We're all pulling for you Cheryl and Jack. Gloria

Donna - I'm sorrier than words can say for your loss. Wishing you peace. Gloria

Yeah, Peggy -- Good luck with that resolution! You can stay off this board. I've done it many times - heheheh - sometimes for a whole day! Seriously, I understand how addicting it is. There are just so many of us and we have to keep up with everybody! It takes a lot of time. Like Norme, my laundry is waiting for me and I need to turn off the water out front, etc. etc. Norme - you made a typo that I like -- describes it better. Instead of buzzer you typed busier -- I like that. Shut up dryer noise, I'm busier with something I like better. Thanks for letting us know Peggy, so we won't worry. Look in on us now and then -- and hurry and get caught up! We'll miss you. Gloria

Cindi - I'm so, so sorry for your loss. Wow, what a strong mother. I agree with the others that you've shown that you inherited that strength from her and you will get through this-- you never get over it. As one who has been where you are and is just a little further down that road, I can tell you "Yes, it will get better" -- but it takes time -- and it also gets worse. It's not a straight line - some days are good - some are bad, but now, 10 months after my husband's death, the good days are beginning to outnumber the bad. Just be kind to yourself and don't hold it all inside thinking that you should be able to get over it. I think it's a big surprise to everybody just how deeply a loved one's death affects us. It's almost a physical pain. There are many of us in this forum who will be glad to listen if you want to vent. Feel free to PM me or any of the others who have lost loved ones. We understand. Hugs and prayers going out to you, Cindi. Gloria

Good luck on your new job, Nancy. I'm sure you'll do fine. I saw the post you're talking about, but can't remember where -- duh -- I seem to have the short term memory prob too! Seriously, I also work in an office -- with lots of computer docs, and detail stuff. I don't have cancer and haven't had any kind of medical treatments for years -- not taking any meds, but I'm worried somewhat about my memory. Of course I am dealing with the stress of grief, but it doesn't seem to fully answer the memory thing. And some of it I had before my husband's diagnosis. I think it was in 2000 that I made reservations and flew by myself to visit family in Maryland. I had told the family my itinerary over the phone and left a copy of it on the frig at home in CA and I carried a copy. In the process of making the reservations, I had been considering two dates for return and finally settled on one. Sometime after I arrived in MD I somehow became convinced that I was returning the day after my actual booked date (the second date I had considered). In spite of my sister saying you told us you were leaving on the 16th and my husband asking over the phone are you still coming home on the 16th? I was fully convinced that I was coming home on the 17th. So much so that I didn't even get out the itinerary to check . I went to bed on the 16th and about midnight woke with a mental picture of the itinerary clearly showing the 16th and sat bolt upright in bed -- checked it. Yep -- I shoulda flown home today! Called the airline right away and got a change -- luckily only paid $50 for changing the flight -- it's more now. Could not believe I had done that! That's been one of the biggest memory goofs I've made, but more recently I've turned the water on to water the roses, forgot it for hours; walked out in the garage and discovered the garage door had been up for a couple hours; I frequently have to go back and double check that the doors are locked because I can't remember by the time I get in the car if I checked them or not. I showed up at a routine lab test only to be told your appointment was yesterday! Enough memory stuff that my daughter laughingly says she doesn't think it'll be long until she finds me aimlessly wandering the streets. I find that I don't have as much trouble at work as I do at home for some reason. I guess I hold myself more accountable there and am more lax at home. I use more post-it notes now and thank heaven for the computer reminders I can set. I'd never make a meeting without them. I've also let friends at work know that I won't be insulted if they remind me of things -- I appreciate it. At home, I bought a small timer that I can take with me from room to room -- and I set it whenever I turn on water, the stove, anything that really needs to be turned off timely. I recently saw a timer on a cord to wear around your neck. I'm gonna buy me one of those -- soon as I can remember where I saw it! Really, I think you'll be ok -- just rely more on notes and reminders. I really hate doing that because my memory used to be one of my really strong traits. I guess nothing lasts forever! And many of my friends who aren't under medical treatment for anything have also remarked about memory failures. Must be something in the air! Best wishes. Gloria