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hoping for the best

David Graf

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Thank you for this wonderful wb site.

My wife of 50 years was diagnosed with Stage iv non small cell lung cancer two weeks ago. She begins chemo treatment tomorrow, dec 10, '04. She is scheduled for 6 weeks of chemo to reduce or eliminate the swelling in her neck. From that point radiation will be used if necessary.

She has a spot on the left lung and so far the cancer hasn't matastized to any other area according to PET Scan, MRI and blood tissue testing.

She was a smoker until 9 years ago, gave it up and of course we never thought this would happen.

There was no indication and still none. She doesn't cough, is not hoarse and doesn't have blood in her mucus or stool.

She does have serious memory problems and has become agitated sometimes severly in the past few months totally unlike her normal disposition and personality. Brain scans and MRI's find no trace of tumors or cancer in the brain.

Just wondering if anyone has a similar experience and thank all of you on this web site for your warmth and reassuring words.


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Hey Dave,

Prior to my diagnosis I was also having memory loss, more so I just wasn’t tracking in a normal mental way. I believe it had something to do with the cance. I have read that the cancer can cause this. I don’t know if the average person has this problem though.

Good luck in your wife’s fight.


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Welcome David, so sorry to hear about your wife. Yes sadly, if everyone quit smoking today, we would still have thousands and thousands of people with lung cancer for many many years to come. Half of the people with lung cancer do not smoke, either never did or quit years and years ago. The swelling in her neck is from the cancer I gather, is the tumor pressing on a blood vessel? Did they tell you where it was?. Please keep us posted on how things are going. Donna G

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Hi Dave,

Sorry you are going through this, and of course, welcome to this site.

I was involved in a car accident with a closed spinal cord injury in 11/02. Suddenly, in Jan. 03, I had severe short term memory loss. I don't know if it was multi-pharm induced, stress induced, or as you say cancer induced....at the time, I was undiagnosed. I did go through a battery of tests for a neuropsychiatric exam. The conclusion was that I was highly intelligent....(why didn't anyone ever tell me this before???(or since) haha. The memory loss was severe and interfered with my daily living.

I was dx with stage lllB in 11/03. No brain mets have ever been found.

My memory has improved gradually and dramatically. However, there are times when I catch myself standing in the middle of a room wondering what in the he!! I was supposed to be doing?

It can be quite frustrating. I am glad there wasn't anyone close to me to see how bad off I was. I am sorry that you have to go through this too. If nothing else shows on the scan, you may want to talk to a neurologist or a physiatrist (phyisical medicine rehabitlitation specialist who has extra years of training in neurology) regarding your concerns. That might be a good start.

All my best to you and your wife as you enter into battle.

Cindi o'h

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Hi Dave and Welcome,There 's lots of people here who know & care a lot about others.As you read the various signatures under the posts you will see how many of us are fighting and doing well.This is a tough battle but we all have a lot going for us these days with all the modern technology and medicine.Finding the right team of doctors to fight with you is very important.Good luck to you and your wife on this roller coaster ride.

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Hi Dave,

Sorry to hear about your wife. Stay with us. The best place for support, sharing and caring. Learn as much as you can and be pro-active. Stay positive and focused. Also down the road if your wife feels up to it a support group is also very helpful. Thoughts and prayers for the best of results.


http://lcam.org (Lung Cancer Awareness Month / November)

http://www.roycastle.org (Roy Castle Lung Cancer Foundation)

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/entrez/quer ... h&DB=books (NCBI / BookShelf)

http://www.plwc.org/plwc/MainConstructo ... _id=&state (Caregiving)

http://www.cancer.org/docroot/MON/MON_1.asp (Track Side Effects)

http://www3.cancer.gov/cancercenters/centerslist.html (NCI-designated Cancer Centers / Cancer Centers Listed by State)

http://www.healthology.com/focus_articl ... cancernews (How To Eat Well During Cancer Treatment)

http://www.lifeclinic.com/focus/nutrition/nutrition.asp (Nutrition Facts and Information Center)

http://www.about-nsclc.com/content/patient/nsclc (Iressa)

http://www.about-nsclc.com/content/prof/about (Iressa)

http://www.findcancerexperts.com (Find Cancer Experts)

http://www.plwc.org/plwc/MainConstructo ... 008,00.asp (Making Decisions About Cancer Treatment)

http://www.chemocare.com (ChemoCare)

http://www.curetoday.com/currentissue/d ... index.html (Toolbox: Resources You Can Use)

http://www.cancerindex.org/clinks8h.htm (Resources for Caregivers)

http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&ie=U ... sa&spell=1 (Medicaid)

http://www.thehealthinsurance.com/medicaid.htm (Medicaid)

http://www.thebeehive.org/health/contests/medicaid.asp (Medicaid)

http://www.lungcancerfyi.com/lung_cancer_faq.html ((Lung Cancer - Frequently Asked Questions)

http://www.lungcanceronline.org/treatme ... osurg.html (Surgery - General Information & What to Expect)

http://www.lungcancerfyi.com/lung_cancer_glossary.html (Lung Cancer Glossary)

http://www.plwc.org/plwc/MainConstructo ... 008,00.asp (Receive the PLWC Bulletin)

http://www.usnews.com/usnews/health/hos ... p_home.htm (Directory Of American Hospitals)

http://www.lungcanceronline.org/tests/index.html (Lung Cancer Online / Test And Procedures)

http://www.vh.org/adult/patient/cancerc ... index.html (Understanding Blood Tests / A Guide for Patients with Cancer)

http://www.cancer.gov/cancerinfo/pdq/tr ... ng/patient (SCLC)

http://www.meds.com/pdq/smallcell_pat.html (Medicine OnLine / SCLG)

http://health.allrefer.com/health/prima ... -info.html (Diseases And Conditions / SCLC)

http://www.hospicefoundation.org (Hospice Foundation Of America)

http://www.hospiceweb.com (Hospice Web)

http://www.hospice-america.org/consumer.html (Hospice Association Of America)

http://www.hospicenet.org (Hospice Net)

http://www.plwc.org/plwc/MainConstructo ... 151,00.asp (PLWC Feature: Talking to Someone With Cancer)

http://www.zanesvilletimesrecorder.com/ ... 87526.html (3-year-old keeps her smile in battle with rare cancer)

http://www.rfalung.com (Radio Frequency Ablation Of Lung Cancer)

http://www.lungcancercoalition.org (Global Lung Cancer Coalition)

http://www.plwc.org/plwc/MainConstructo ... 008,00.asp (PLWC Feature: Financial Support Resources)

http://www.usnews.com/usnews/nycu/healt ... hqcanc.htm (Best Hospitals)

https://www.alcase.org/advocacy/sign_the_petition.html (Advocacy / Sign the Petition)

http://www.cancersymptoms.org (Oncology Nursing Society)

http://www.plwc.org/plwc/MainConstructo ... 008,00.asp (Questions to Ask the Doctor)

http://www.alcase.org/education/publica ... reath.html (With Every Breath A Lung Cancer Guidebook / From ALCASE / A Wealth Of Information / Free)

http://www.cancersurvivaltoolbox.org (The Cancer Survival Toolbox / Free / From NCCS)

http://www.centerwatch.com (Clinical Trails Listing Service / Center Watch)

http://news.google.com/news?hl=en&editi ... ung+cancer (Lung Cancer In The News)

http://www.thewellnesscommunity.org/pro ... /guide.asp (The Wellness Community / National Cancer Support, Education And Support / Free)

http://www.drugs.com (Drug Information Online)

http://www.alcase.org (ALCASE / Alliance For Lung Cancer Advocacy, Support, Education)

http://www.nlm.nih.gov (Unites States / National Library Of Medicine)

http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/encyclopedia.html (Health Information / Medical Encyclopedia)

http://www.google.com (Great Search Engine)

http://blochcancer.org (R.A. Bloch Cancer Foundation, Inc. / Please read: A Letter to all newly diagnosed cancer patients)

http://www.cancer.org (American Cancer Society)

http://www.cancer.gov (Cancer Information Service / NCI)

http://www.cancerresearchcenter.org (Cancer Research Center)

http://www.aicr.org (American Institute for Cancer Research; Nutrition Hotline / AICR)

http://www.cancerhopenetwork.org (Cancer Hope Network)

http://www.acor.org (Association of Cancer Online Resources / Free Online Lifeline For Everyone Affected By Cancer & Related Disorders)

http://www.meds.com/lung/lunginfo.html (Lung Cancer Information Library)

http://www.lungusa.org (American Lung Association)

http://www.ama-assn.org (American Medical Association)

http://www.docguide.com/news/content.ns ... g%20Cancer (Doctor’s Guide / Lung Cancer)

http://www.healthfinder.gov/Scripts/Sea ... ?topic=506 (Healthfinder)

http://www.medicinenet.com/Lung_Cancer/article.htm (Medicine Net)

http://www.cancerindex.org/clinks2l.htm (Cancer Index / Lung Cancer Resources Directory)

http://www.nfcr.org/site/PageServer?pag ... ncers_lung (National Foundation For Cancer Research)

http://www.patientadvocate.org (Patient Advocate Foundation)

http://www.lungcanceronline.org/effects ... fects.html (Lung Cancer Online / Hematologic (Blood) Effects)

http://www.cancerlinks.org/lung.html (Lung Cancer Links)

http://www.cancer-free.com (Cancer Free Connections)

http://www.healthinsite.gov.au/topics/C ... ung_cancer (Health Insite)

http://www.lungcancerclaims.com (Lung Cancer / Lung Cancer Information Page)

http://www.cancerlifecenter.com/engine. ... =dictionar (Cancer Life Center/ Cancer Dictionary)

http://www.canceryellowpages.com/Resour ... G%20CANCER (Cancer yellow Pages)

http://icare.org (ICARE / The International Cancer Alliance)

http://www.vh.org/index.html (Virtual Hospital)

http://www.lungcanceronline.org/support/financial.html (Lung Cancer Online / Financial, Legal & Insurance Issues)

http://www.lungcanceronline.org/index.htm (Lung Cancer Online / HomePage)

http://cancernews.healthology.com/focus ... cancernews (Cancer News)

http://cis.nci.nih.gov/fact/7_48.htm (Follow-up Care: Questions and Answers)

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Welcome, David. I'm in a similar position, with a wife who was diagnosed with NSCLC, Stage IV, except she had many bone mets from the lung cancer. She is now in her 27th month since diagnosis, so hang in there and hang onto your hope. There are many survivors on this website. Your wife's memory problems can be due to the major stress that comes with knowing you have cancer. Cancer is a family disease -- all suffer -- and all get weird from time to time. All part of this journey on a road we didn't want to be on. But, we are on it, and the main thing is how we handle the journey. We are here for you and your wife, so take full advantage of the family here. Best to you both. Don

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Hi Dave

Welcome. This is a wonderful site for information and support - you won't find better! My Mum was diagnosed with stage IV NSCLC in July 2003. She remains asymptomatic, and has tolerated her chemo extremely well. I hope that your wife continues to be symptom-free for a long time to come - it IS possible!!

All the best


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Hi Dave and WELCOME!

Please keep us posted how your wife is doing with the chemo. If you have any questions, someone here can surely answer them.

Like you, I'm on the caregiver side of the fence. It can get tough at times, so stay close and we'll all get through the tough times together.

God bless you,


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