NancyT Posted February 10, 2007 Posted February 10, 2007 I was so overwhelmed standing in the doorway today...trucks packed,house empty,just standing there in the rain. I kept telling myself i could come back if I wanted too....but the truth is the new family moves in on sunday. My Dad's house is sold....its been eight long months of every weekend up there(its in the Santa Cruz mountains, 2 hrs from me)keeping things clean while on the market. I know it is time for me to come to peace with this...I just don't know how. I somehow felt my Dad was still here...I would say"my Dads house". I met the new family...they were wonderful and love the place...that gave me some peace. So much to deal with on this journey. I imagine I will drive by in a few weeks...it will always be"my Dads house" NancyT Quote
Treebywater Posted February 10, 2007 Posted February 10, 2007 ((((Nancy)))) I can't understand entirely, but I think I can a little.... I hate the feeling of losing 'home.' I'm sorry it hurts. Quote
RandyW Posted February 10, 2007 Posted February 10, 2007 I feel loss whenever I part with some thing of Debs and I stil have clothes. This I understand is the ultimate loss. Remember though, You will always carry the memories and those are the most important thing to us always. Hugs and Prayers Quote
mamasbabygirl Posted February 10, 2007 Posted February 10, 2007 This is so hard. My stepdad sold their family home while my mom was still alive, so that made it easier (I think). Try to focus on the fact that the new family will make it their home and create many wonderful memories there too. (Nancy) Quote
gail p-m Posted February 10, 2007 Posted February 10, 2007 Oh, I do so understand. It's been 6 months since my Dad passed away. (I can't believe it's been that long already). Anyhow, he lived in the house since 1966. Yes, it's "Dad's house". I live quite far away but my sister has been slowly cleaning it up; she couldn't even go into it by herself for the first few months. There will probably be a garage sale in April and then the house will be put on the market. When I think of Dad's house, I think of him sitting in "his chair" in the living room. That's the way I will always remember it. I have talked to my "counsellor" and she mentioned to me what I already knew -- that I should go back before it's sold because I need some sort of "closure" with the house and N.Y. since I've been there virtually every summer for a few weeks and that won't be happening anymore. I can't imagine anyone else living in "Dad's house" but, of course, have to accept the inevitable. So yes, Nancy, I do understand only "too well" what your feeeling. ((Nancy)) gail p-m Quote
DianeR Posted February 10, 2007 Posted February 10, 2007 Nancy, I understand the pain you are having with the sale of your dad's house. It does hurt. A year after my dad died my mom had to sell the house because it was just too much house for her to keep up. My parent's lived in their house for 55 years. This was HOME. It was the only home I had lived in before I got married. I thought we would have it forever . My dad was a builder so he had built on to this house. We had the most beautiful stone fireplace in the family room. This house was truely daddy's house and we loved it. I took videos and pictures of our house before mom moved out, but I have been unable to watch or look at them. It is just too painful to know it is not ours anymore. Nancy I do understand and I agree with you "it will always be dad's house". Diane Quote
Kasey Posted February 10, 2007 Posted February 10, 2007 It will always be dad's house........yes it will. Have no other words for you except that you can keep in your heart everything about dad and his house forever. Kasey Quote
Welthy Posted February 10, 2007 Posted February 10, 2007 (((Nancy))), I understand your pain and am so sorry for this to be happening to you. It took us almost a year to close up and sell our family home after my Dad passed (Mom had gone 5 years before.) It was the only home all seven of us ever knew. Going through the items and cleaning out was very theraputic for the two of us that did it. In my dreams, most of the time, I'm still living in that house although its been 18 years since I've set foot in it. I find those dreams very comforting. May you have good memories and happiness when you remember your Dad's house. Welthy (Debi) Quote
Maryanne Posted February 10, 2007 Posted February 10, 2007 I know what you mean. It is so heart breaking that the house you knew as home is gone. I still go by my parent's home (was) when Iam in Philly. I miss my childhood home and my parents being there. I know what you are feeling. I am sorry... Maryanne Quote
MomsGirl Posted February 15, 2007 Posted February 15, 2007 Nancy- I'm so sorry you are going through this. My dad keeps mentioning selling the house now that Mom is gone and it's like a knife in my heart. Yet there's a knife in my heart every time I go there and she is not waiting at the door for me, and I have to go in and be surrounded by the essence of her, in every stick of furniture and every picture on the wall. Does that make sense? Sorry, I digress. I know what you mean, it will ALWAYS be a family house... Quote
Suzie Q Posted February 16, 2007 Posted February 16, 2007 Nancy, I am so there right now! I think that's why it has taken nearly a year to get my parents' condo ready for sale. It was so comforting to be able to stop in there and see what remained of personal items (most of it was divided between us siblings a month after my mom passed), and I can attest to the therapeutic value of sortin through some things, though it was difficult. Now so much has been removed, it has been repainted and new floor and window coverings are being installed this week, and it seems now like my parents were never there. That's the hardest part, seeing it so empty and devoid of their touch... hugs to you, Karen Quote
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