babylove91297 Posted September 14, 2007 Share Posted September 14, 2007 Hi everyone, I had a co-worker ask me yesterday how my tests went. I told him that I had gotten the results on the breast biopsy and it showed no cancer. He said thats wonderful you don't have cancer. I told him that I didn't say that, I said I don't have breast cancer, but I do have lung cancer. This man proceded to go off on my about how I caused this myself because I smoked (I quit smoking almost 5 months ago, long before I found out about the cancer). I couldn't believe the nerve of this guy. I was speachless. Have any of you ever been faced with such ignorance? If so what did you say? A lot of people know about my diagnosis and everyone else has been so kind, this really blew me away. What I really felt like doing was to b***h slap him, but I refrained, and just walked away. I can tell you that I didn't let him steal my joy that I don't have breast cancer, but in a way he did make me feel responsible for having lung cancer. Believe me if I could take back all them years of smoking, I would do it in a heartbeat just to have never heard the words.....You have lung cancer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tjrasMOM Posted September 14, 2007 Share Posted September 14, 2007 I just posted about this regarding my mom. People ask her all the time. And they ask me when I talk about her Dx. We're both tired of it & get annoyed when people ask. Mom is now responding, "Ya know, I'm really tired of answering that question because with that question, it feels as though you are blaming me for my Dx....Like I brought this on myself and I don't need to hear that." I always add that unfortunately there are many lung cancer patients who were never smokers.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J.C. Posted September 14, 2007 Share Posted September 14, 2007 I think those people are rude and perhaps saying, ''Ignorance is no excuse for the law'' '' Ignorance of a sickness is no escuse for your answer'' I think that would stop and make some people think in the future. Jackie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leela Posted September 14, 2007 Share Posted September 14, 2007 NO ONE DESERVES CANCER! Whether it be lung, breast, skin, ovarian, or any of the other types. It's too bad that so many people are so ignorant. I'm sorry that you had to be on the receiving end of such thoughtless remarks. Lisa Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adrian Posted September 14, 2007 Share Posted September 14, 2007 If someone were to say that in regards to my dad, if I didnt attack them, I would say "Thank you for your kind words of support during this, the most difficult time of my life, I only hope that I have the chance to repay the favor." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nick C Posted September 14, 2007 Share Posted September 14, 2007 I and my wife have encountered many rude peopel over the last year. I told some former co workers at lunch about the foundation we're starting, and how detection for LC sucks. He proceeded to tell me that we already know the answer...don't smoke. I told him that answer isn't good enough for the 30K americans who never smoked who will be dxed this year. What an .... I don't know wht I may get censored for. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sharonjo Posted September 14, 2007 Share Posted September 14, 2007 Babylove, So sorry for the ignorant comments of your co-worker. Some people are just rude and nasty, and there is nothing you can do about that. You handled yourself well and that is something to be proud of! We are all fighting the stigma attached to lung cancer - and we are all in your corner! Way to go Adrian! Perfect comeback!!! Thank you Nick for your contribution to Lung Cancer Awareness and Early Detection! Sharon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VegasMomOf3 Posted September 14, 2007 Share Posted September 14, 2007 Face it, people with "foot-in-mouth" syndrome are just lacking in education. I myself have wanted to slap a few people silly but instead I just tell them that I will say a special prayer just for them, asking that they & family never have to walk in the shoes of cancer patients & family members. As I see their jaw grazing the floor, it truly satisfies my desire to knock them out cold, but more importantly I honestly believe it makes them THINK!!! Be Blessed, Donna Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sis Posted September 15, 2007 Share Posted September 15, 2007 I've heard just about enough of the tactless, tasteless, remarks from individuals who can be classified as nothing but moronic. Any person who is insensitive enough to make such a statement only proves that Lung Cancer Awareness needs more worldwide attention and FUNDING!!!! OK, sorry... I'm stepping off my soap box (again). Ellie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wendyr Posted September 15, 2007 Share Posted September 15, 2007 The hell with getting off the soap box. We all need to get on the soap box big time. I too am just about done with the stigma that is attached to this disease and we all need to come up with some snappy answers to the imbecilic dolts out there that think they have the right to look down their long noses at us and our loved ones and blame us for this disease. We've all experienced this so come everyone, let's get some snappy answers going. wendyr Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cindy RN Posted September 15, 2007 Share Posted September 15, 2007 Give me a snappy-not to rude-remark to say back. Anyone?? Cindy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fillise Posted September 15, 2007 Share Posted September 15, 2007 I'm sorry you had to endure such rudeness. I'd say it was a "teachable moment," but I've discovered that most people think they already know everything about what causes lung cancer and they don't really listen to anything else. Breast cancer would have gotten you sympathy, but lung cancer gets you a lecture. Somehow this is going to make October harder to take than I think it is already going to be. Not that I have anything but respect for women facing breat cancer, but you'd think it is the only cancer women ever get. Mosey over to the pub and I'll buy you a drink! Since it is early on Saturday, how about a couple of bloody marys? Susan Susan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KatieB Posted September 15, 2007 Share Posted September 15, 2007 First off, you can stop blaming yourself. There is more than a 24% chance that even if you had NEVER smoked a cigarette in your life, you would have gotten lung cancer. People who never smoked get it too. That jerk was perpetuating a stigma that in and of itself isolates those who get lung cancer and extremely hinders and limits the funding to find a cure for it. While never smoking significantly improves your chances of not getting lung cancer, Lung Cancer is NOT a preventable disease. Yes, it was a teachable moment, as someone else said...and then there are times when you don't want to waste your time and a slap across the face works just a good. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nova Posted September 15, 2007 Share Posted September 15, 2007 I'm in no way, shape or form, saying that smoking is ever "good",-- it's a horrible, nasty, unhealthy thing to do, and I can say that without malice, because I smoke... . I got tired of that question when people would ask about Harry too, so I finally started responding with the following statement: " Do you know that 100% of non-smoker's pass away"? Usually by the time they "get" what I mean, I've had enough time to walk away from them.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yirol Posted September 16, 2007 Share Posted September 16, 2007 I don't have lung cancer: my father does. But I would probably have b***h slapped him and let him ruin my joy AND gotten fired. Congratulations for being the better, stonger person. Keep it up. I even get annoyed by people asking "what kind of cancer?" as if that's going to make a difference to anyone or as if they have the secret weapon to solving "It." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blueeye Posted September 17, 2007 Share Posted September 17, 2007 Yeah, I agree about folks thinking that women only get breast cancer. October is coming up and we have a wear pink day in our town. I love pink but I don't want to wear it now because people need to be educated on lots of other cancers. I am helping our Relay for Life team design a cancer-neutral t shirt to sell. The poo-pooed my "Cancer Sucks" idea but I did order my own shirt, wristband and sticker for my car! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ErinC1973 Posted September 17, 2007 Share Posted September 17, 2007 I like Adrian's answer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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