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Sharon, I suspect that my post was one of the ones that has made it difficult for you and for that I'm sorry. I'm here to support you 100%. I can't imagine what this has been like for you, expecially with the loss of your sister, but it sounds like Mike "knows" that the surgery is not for him. Sometimes we do need to trust our instincts. Does that make it any easier for you--I don't know, but please know that we will be here to support you through this. If we(I) overreact interms of wanting people to pursue aggressive treatment it is just that we get so many people here who have been told that their situation is hopeless and we want them to see that it is not. Sometimes we (I) might go too far in that effort. If you are going to be Mike's support through this, then we want to be your support--100%--ok? Susan

Oh Liz, You will be missed. The courage with which you fought this disease was an inspiration to so many of us. I loved the photo of that showed you having fun with your friends. I shall always remember you fighting, playing, and living as hard as you could despite all this disease wanted to do to take that away from you. You are now beyond the grasp of this disease and freed from its evil effects. I am happy for you, but your friends on this board will miss you terribly. Love, Susan

Sharon, I wonder if Mike doesn't want the surgery because he doesn't think it will make a difference in the long run. So many people hear the words "lung cancer" and then think there is nothing that can be done for them. There is also a perception that treatment is worse that the disease. Those perceptions may have been true at one time, but are not anymore. At 1b he has a good chance of, if not a complete cure, a good and long remission. I haven't had the surgery so I can't speak to how hard it is, but others here have and will offer their experiences. Has Mike talked to other LC patients? It seems like you both have talked to a lot of doctors, but maybe if he talked with people who have been through the surgery then he would be making a decision based on a more complete understanding of the process. He might also be able to talk to someone who has confronted their fears and can help him with that. I also wonder (and please don't read this as blame because I don't mean it in that way) if he just doesn't want to have to quit smoking again. People tell me that quitting smoking is one of the hardest things they've ever done and if he is stressed by everything else, his smoking may something he feel he just doesn't want to give up. Or maybe subconsciously he blames himself and doesn't think he really deserves to be treated. If it is one of the things that he feels like he needs during this stressful time, I can see why he might resist giving it up. Again, this isn't blame, but it could be a reason. Ok, I'm way beyond my pay grade (which would be 0) on the psychoanalysis. Ultimately it is his decision, but it also affects you. You should at least have the opportunity to say what you think about his choices. Being supportive does not always mean agreeing with everything someone wants to do just because they want to do it. Good Luck, Susan

Great news Bucky!!!! Susan

Saying a prayer for you both. Susan

Thelma, I have not had chemo, but my 77 year-old mom did chemo last year for stage IV NSCLC. She did four rounds of Carboo/Taxol from Feb-May and did really well with it. While it wasn't a walk in the park, it wasn't nearly as bad as she expected. She achieved a good result--1/3 shrinkage of the primary tumor and stable results since then. She has been on no treatment since May and as you can see from the photo below (taken at Thanksgiving) she doesn't look sick at all. She did lose her hair, but it has grown back--curly where it used to be stick straight. You can read my profile below for all the details. I know there will be others who will give your their first hand experience, but I wanted you to hear about a 77 year-old woman who did fine! Susan

I bet that game really perked up your dad! I hope you made a really wonderful memory on Sunday. Susan

I'm sorry to hear that the Tarceva didn't work, but perhaps the Alimta will. I will pray it is so!!! Susan

Good luck with your surgery today. I will be praying that it is successful and gets ALL the cancer!!!! Susan

I am so sorry for your loss. There are a lot of people here who are grieving the loss of a spouse. You are not alone and will certainly find friends who will help you find your way. If you will scroll down the main forum index, you will find a board especially for those who are grieving the loss of a loved one. God bless you, Suan

I am so sorry for your loss. It souds like you gave him a glorious transition. Susan

Will, I am so very sorry for your loss. You will be in my prayers. Susan

I think your mom would be so proud. It's ok to miss her and ok to be sad. Susan

I am so very sorry. Susan

I'm so sorry to hear about your mom's diagnosis. Have the Drs. suggested any treatment for her? If not, you should probably get a second opinion. There are many here who have been diagnosed with brain mets who have seen a positive response on treatment. It is good that you found us. Please feel free to ask any question you may have and to give us more spcifics about your mom's diagosis. You might want to also visit: www.onctalk.com This website is run by Dr. Jack West, an oncologist in Seattle who specializes in the treatment of lung cancer. If you register on the site (free) you can ask him questions about your mother's diagnosis. In the meantime, hang in there. It is so easy to feel overwhelmed in the beginning. Susan

I am so sorry your father-in-law has been diagnosed with the Pancoast tumor. One of the tings that frustrated a lot of us in the begining is the amount of time it takes to get a diagnosis and a treatment plan. It seems to be the norm that this does not move swiftly. Please feel free to ask any questions you have. There are many people who have been through this and are more than willing to share their experiences. Susan

Derek, I just found your post and am so sorry that your grandfather is at this stage. I will keep him and you in my prayers. Susan

Lilly, I'm so glad you checked in to give us an update. it sounds like you have had a "full" visit. Please have a safe trip home and let us know when you arrive safely. Susan ps--those great-grandbabies are ADORABLE!

Carrie--continued prayers for you and your mom. Susan

Will, continued prayers for you and Diana. Susan

((((Grace))))

Mitchell--thanks for stopping in and letting us know you and your mom are doing well. Your words were very inspiring--and so true, we have to fight through the fear to the hope and the fight! Susan

Cat--I'm so sorry that they couldn't get the tunor with the surgery. Another twist in a road already too twisted. I will keep her in my prayers. Susan

Shelley, I'm sorry to hear about this complication for your mom. My mom got her port in her arm and hasn't had any trouble with it, so I don't have any advice on the port issue. I can provide daughter advice--if it will make you feel better to get on a plane and go see her for yourself--GO! I realize that may be easuier said than done, but I know how hard it is to be so far away. Susan

((((Carrie))))