Johnny: If an oncologist told me that I had terminal lung cancer and there was little that could be done, I would find another oncologist. You are doing all the right things.
One thing that might work is to get the second opinion in Chicago, and have their recommendations administered at the local clinic in Dubuque. That is what I have been doing for my situation. I see doctors at a very good cancer center in Seattle, and have my treatment in my home town, about 150 miles away. The Seattle docs and my local oncologist have a good relationship.
Of course, it may be possible that the Chicago guys will agree with what Dubuque says in terms of treatment. But, I don't think an an oncologist should offer an opinion that one's cancer is terminal.
I have been doing this cancer thing for over 4 years now and still have a reasonably good quality of life.
Don M