Andrea

I am so sorry

i am the chub club failure

Becky had a great idea for a new thread--discussing a California bash Anyone interested?

Heather posted about an article in SELF magainze in the LC in the news forum. It has been suggested that since lung cancer seems to be so hot now that we write to lots of media and publication. Does an yone want to get involved? Maybe we can get a standardized letter and blanket mags, newspapers, tv, etc?

Thank you for posting Dean! You are an inspiration to us all.

oy vey, i am so sorry to hear that

I just wanted to say I am thinking of you and Lucie

I just voted, my mom is 250mg and has the icky side effects.

Kim, I know how hard this is for you. It is not a fun journey. Regarding the chemo and radiaton and side effects, like Peggy said, it is c umulative. When my mom first started chemo she was fine. Then gradually it got worse. Same with radiation, it was worse right at the end. Thankfully it was the end when it was the worse. It stinks, but it is NORMAl to gradually get worse before better. Hang in there!

Thanks for the info! The trial was for something else, not Iressa. The onc said if she didn't qualify for teh trial for whatever reason, Iressa was teh back up. Just a bummer b/c he was so excited about the trial

I got my copy of Self too and just read the article! We SHOULD jump on this. I will post somthig later in Activism about writing to magazines if someone else doesn't first. I gotta run and do something now, i was just checking in briefly

Good luck with the new trial! i can't wait to hear good results!

Hi Ben, What stage is your mom? The thoracic surgeon said it best w hen my mom was diagnosed---the only way to help her is to make her REALLY sick so then hopefully she can be better. The chemo wiped my mom out too, coughing got worse, etc, etc. They gotta do taht to make her better in the end Does that make sense?

Silkee, My mom is Marsha too. I am so sorry you lost your mom to this disease. I commend you for wanting to take action and do something!!! I dont have any info on your location, but if you would like please post in the Activism forum, we are trying to get things going, it has been quiet. Wishing you the best

I love you all. I really do! Thanks! I am off to see my mom now. We have a ritual and she said she would have to literally be on her death bed to not do it, we get our haircut/colored every 5 weeks together. I know this is going to sound very shallow/superficial, but the test of how she is will be if she wants to go to Nordstroms after, which is at the other end of the mall. That is our thing. Some people have a thing of family brunches, church, tempke, etc. Every 5 weeks, hair and Nordstroms is us When she got diagnosed, she cried that that is what she will miss the most, she hated not being able to go with me when she was on chemo. Karen--scans should be coming up in August, don't have a date yet. I am upset for a few other people and I feel for them so it puts me more on edge and makes me more crankier and upset aobut my mom. You all know what I mean:)

Thanks everyone. And Peggy, I would love to meet you sometime. When you are in CA, I will come up to Pleasant Hills. Sometimes this just hits you. I ened up leaving work at 4:30, came home, napped, went to dinner with Brian, and playing on computer and will watch some tv soon till it is bed time. I know what one of the biggest problems is---I spend too much time on cancer webpages. I just sat there reading a bunch of stories on ALCASE of people and how they were diagnosed, etc. I sometimes wonder, was cancer always around me or is it new? I think it always was, I jsut hear more stories now. I heard a GREAT story today. We just hired someone new at work, her friend, age 30 has lukemia. She needed a bone marrow transplant. Not only was her sister a match, but her brother in law too That is so rare, so now she is going to play the lottery :) Thanks! It is so nice to be able to whine and vent here. I know we all get down when the news on the board is not that good. I love you all!

My mom kind of freaked out at the hospital when she got her first chemo, she cried, didn't want to get it, etc, etc. She started paxil and xanax and got better in time. It is natural

Just venting over this stupid disease. I don't get it. My mom was dancing the horah better than I was at my own wedding after she had chemo! Surgery went well. Tolerated radiation even though it knocked her out. Declared in remission. Started Iressa. And NOW THE DOWNWARD SPIRAL BEGINS!!!!! Fatigue, nausea, loss of appetite, lethargic, etc. It is so discouraging! She has not had scans since surgery except for the scan in radiology to guide the radiation stuff, so boy oh boy will I be nervous for those! I had a mental breakdown last night over all of this---I decided I had lung cancer b/c in Sept 2002 a ct for gallstones showed an infiltrate/opacity on my lung. Yes, I had a follow up scan and it was "resolved", "no evidence of thoracic abnormality" "clear lungs" per report, but what if they read it wrong? SO I called Hoag Hospital and had them fax me the report again today for me to read. As someoneat work said, cancer does not mysteriously disappear without treatment and to chill out. The report said clear. Logically I know that is right Anyway, it bugs me how terrible she is feeling. And then a shower--we have a shower on Sunday for my to be sister in law. My mom went to the first shower June 26 and was in bed two days later. She was not giong to this one on Sunday. Well now she says she might want to go. I found out why. SHe wants to give ME the allusion she is feeling better! I want her to rest and not over do it! So we ahve been arguing over this little stupid issue. She admitted to me that is why she is going (I know her too well) and then my mother in law confirmed that is what my mom said!!!! BUT my mom did promise that if she is too weak she won't go. She said today she would be too weak to go. And I have NO reason to vent when others have much bigger issues, but I am having my pity party I will go home and rent a movie and chill tonight.

Did you ask permission to abandon us to go to a party???? Just kidding! Have fun everyone!!!

Denise, I am so sorry, it is not easy. To me somethng you said makes sense, she is so tired it is hard to fight. WHen you have no energy you can't do things. BUT your mom did walk the other dayw hen she had the strength and she eats when she can, so don't look at it like she is giving up If she were giving up she would not have agreed to start Irsessa. Being in a hospital also makes yolu feel blah. It is good that the scans have not changed, she could be feelign teh effects of just the entire toll on this disease. Hang in there!

I have no experience but I want you to know tht you and keith are in my thughts all the time!

I commend everyone who is doing the walks :) I wish I had the time/strength/engery/family support to organize one myself as well, but I don't I can add my two cents in having been involved with Relay. MAKE SURE YOU HAVE INSURANCE FOR YOUR EVENT!!!!!! It is VERY important. Most venues require that you have it. Renee had posted about this in Activism awhile back and I learned more about it looking into it

As our oncologidt told my mom, the chest was ripped open! Of course it is going ot hurt!!!!! I am glad he does not have to go back in

i thought that was the only address no problems here

Joni, YOU ARE WONDERFUL!!! I am going to answer your question was to "why" you can and are doing it with 4 letters---ALEX!!!! You have no choice and you are doing what any good mother would do. You ARE grieving and you ARE caring for your child. We all handle things differently. I am not sure if this analogy makes sense, but I will never forget this discussion from 1st year of law school. If someone is raped and does not fight back, that does not mean they consented. In a fearful situation, some people may freeze and become paralyzed. Other people would kick and scream with all their might. Everyone reacts differently. There are so many different emotions and so many different stages you will go through. Also, you have been grieving for a long time, before Robert passed, when hospice was called in, etc. You are going through the steps. Some days are going to be bad, some days better. Right now you are doing the best you can and you are doing everything right. You are to be commended!