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I found this place because Snowflake responded to my posting on ChooseHope's discussion board, so I thought I'd drop in and poke around a bit. I am the daughter of a martyr to this horrible disease. I am going to school now (after a long absence) in hopes of eventually starting a research foundation to help cure this disease or at least find a reliable screening test..

My mom was 43 when she was diagnosed with Stage III Non-Small Cell Lung Cancer in December of 2000, being life long Democrats, I had teased her that it was only the election results that was making her sick, but alas it was Cancer. My mom had been pretty close to pack a day smoker for 25+ years when she was diagnosed, that seems to temper peoples' responses to the disease, by that logic I guess we should chastise obese people who develop diabetes, like it was deserved, needless to say there were a lot of mean, hateful people, but luckily there were also a lot of nice people too. In March of 2001, after a couple of different chemos and radiation therapy my mom died. One month and One day shy of her 44th birthday, I was 24 at the time. Currently, two of my very best friend's mom is dying of colo-rectal cancer and it has been really hard for me to handle, because I've been throught it and know what's coming and I have no idea how to help them deal with this. Anyway, I'm glad there is a resource like this out there.



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welcome. I don't care if your mom was a chimney, no one deserves this hateful disease.

There are survivors from every stage and type here. This beast can be fought. Every day new things come along and the human spirit alone can do remarkable things.

get your self educated about LC and be your moms advocate. Its the best way you can help her yourself.

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Welcome to the club noone wants to join. But there are a lot of good people here, and there is a ton of support available from people in similar situations. And amen to what Shelly said.

How long have you been in Wichita? I have an aunt and uncle in Salina, and my grandfather and some cousins in Hays, so my travels bring me your way some of the time. I think Elaine lives in Wichita, too.


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Welcome, Nicki.

I am sorry you lost your mother to this disease, and so very young (both of you). For you to head into research and finding a way to get rid of the disease is testimony to her life...

As for the friends who are facing losing their mother, just be there for them. You KNOW how low it is, they have yet to experience it. Be there for them when there's no one around and the waves of grief are overwhelming and unbearable.

Dying of cancer is not pretty, you have been through it, try to prepare them for the shocks and bumps along the path.

Take care,


aka Snowflake

PS I'm so glad you decided to stop in. http://www.choosehope.com/forum/read.php?f=1&i=212&t=46

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Hi Nicki and WELCOME! I'm so sorry to hear that you lost your wonderful mother to this horrible disease. You were so young when she died. It's never easy for any of us to lose our parents, but I think it's especially hard for people your age.

You know from your own experience that the best thing you can do for your friends is to just be there for them. Hold them when they cry and touch them when they are struggling to hold themselves together. Words don't usually even need to be spoken, just being there and lots of hugs will say it all.

Once again, Welcome! Please let us know how we can help.

God bless you,


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  • 2 weeks later...

I just wanted to thank all of you for your kind words. I'm currently attending school for a History/Political Science degree. I figure that the biggest potential research funder is the government, so better to know it from the inside out.

I wish you all the best in fighting this disease. You all should be commended for your courage, compassion and enduring spirit.

Good luck to you all.


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I am so sorry for your loss. I know what it is like to be stigmatized with the term "lung cancer." Nobody asks anyone with breast cancer if they ate too much fat in their diets.

Please go on with your studies so you may some day make a difference in this disease. My daughter lost her father and I lost my husband to lc just 4 years ago. I have had the same disease for the past 3 years. So, my poor baby will lose both her parents to this. She, too, has promised me that she will do all she can to bring focus and attention to lung cancer. She's in law school right now. I am as proud of her as I know your mom must have been with you.



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