dkk64131 Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 I am the sister of a stage 3 cancer victim. The victim is my dear brother. His diagnosis was very sudden and his prognosis is not good, depending on his PET tomorrow. I would just like to hear of others who might be in my spot. Support and feedback is very needed. thank you. Debbie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shineladysue Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 Welcome Debbie, We are glad you have joined us here. None of us want to be here , but we are thankful to have one another. There are people here in all different stages of lung cancer that are doing quite well. There are some differences that you may want to know first. There's non small cell lung cancer and small cell lung cancer. There are differences in treatment and responses of both. You will also see a designated forum for each here. The more information you have about his diagnosis, the better the members here will be able to help you. For now, take it one day at a time and know that this site is wonderful for information and support. I'm sure you will soon know that you have joined a very , warm and caring group of people. Hugs to you sue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cindi o'h Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 Hi Debbie. Just what Sue said.... Boy, do I know that fear... Lung cancer is really scary, but it can be survived! This is the start of a journey for you and your brother. I am so glad that you are reaching out for help and you will get a whole lot of attention and support here, that is for sure. For me, the fear comes and goes in waves. I hope that you have the skills readily available to deal with that part. All the best to you and your family. Cindi o'h Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ry Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 Well a little over two years ago my husband was given the same diagnosis. I hope your brother gets some good news. Let us know, and welcome, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snowflake Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 Debbie, First thing you need to do is change your thinking. Do NOT call your brother a cancer "victim". He is a cancer WARRIOR. "Victim" claims defeat and this is one fight you never want to give up before it has even begun. Many people here are facing grim statistics - and beating them. Take some time to digest the news and accept it. This is something you will have to work through mentally. THEN, take off the gloves, roll up your sleeves, and join in the battle! Welcome to the family no one wants to join. The cancer journey sucks, but the traveling companions are top notch! Becky Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SBeth Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 Hi Debbie, Welcome to the "family". You'll be learning alot over the next few days, weeks and months. Some of it will be very reassuring and some of what you learn will be very disturbing and hard to accept. Take your time digesting everything and please remember that no two people are the same and everyone responds and reacts differently to treatment. Please come back and let us know the results of your brother's PET and how we can help. The support and love here is overwhelming. Love, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SDianneB Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 First thing you need to do is change your thinking. Do NOT call your brother a cancer "victim". He is a cancer WARRIOR. "Victim" claims defeat and this is one fight you never want to give up before it has even begun. (Says the ever shy Becky! ) Ditto that, and just hang in here and you'll read words from some of the most wonderful people you'll ever come in contact with who have "been there, done that." Best wishes, Di Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hebbie Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 I would like to add to the "Welcomes" and I agree wholeheartedly with what has already been said. This isn't any easy battle, by any means, but it IS one that can be fought and won. Your brother will need a support network that he can rely on, not only for positivity, but for helping him digest what is going on -- sometimes in a doctors appointment, two sets of ears are better than one (we hear what we want to hear at times.....). Take some time to learn this new cancer "lingo" and get him to an oncologist specializing in lung cancer, if you can. It sounds as though you will be a wonderful advocate for your brother -- come here often, it is a wonderful place for information and support! Heather Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Don Wood Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 Hi, Debbie. I'm in the same boat, with my wife Stage IV NSCLC. There are many survivors of Stage III and IV on here, so take heart. Give us a bio on your hubby, so we can respond appropriately. See my wife's below here. Blessings. Don Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mhutch1366 Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 Welcome, Welcome, and again, Welcome, Debbie. Your brother is not a victim, but a survivor, as he is alive!! Many of us have survived the diagnosis of lung cancer. Some of us may even have beaten it completely. Find an oncologist with a positive outlook, who you connect with, ask questions, and write down the answers. It's a good idea for someone to go with your brother to write down questions and answers. It never hurts to get a second opinion. There are radiation oncologists, surgeons, and oncologists who primarily are involved with chemotherapy. Sometimes a pulmonary doctor gets involved. Stage III depends on a lot of things == which type of cancer is it, and where is it? are really important starting points. There is a lot of information on this site, and a lot of support from the wonderful people here. We've walked in those shoes, as patient, survivor, caregiver, spouse, sibling, parent, child...... we even have an oncologist and a few nurses. We can help you. Keep us informed, and know that we care. XOXOXOX Prayers always, MaryAnn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DonnaB Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 Welcome again Debbie, Just want to confirm all the above: you will find a terrific amount of support, information and a place you can ALWAYS come to. It sounds like you will be a strong advocate for your brother and an encouraging medical team is crucial. If you don't have one now, please seek a second opinion. Everyone here has been on this bumpy road and will provide alot of direction. Wishing you strength, a positive attitude and love, DonnaB Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frank Lamb Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 Debbie, Welcome to our support family.There are many people here who were given a bad prognosis.(myself included) You will be amazed at the number of survivors here that are fighting and making a mockery of the statistics and prognosis's (sp).Our best wishes to you and your brother and please keep us informed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BoBennett Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 Hey Debbie, Hang into this site it is by bar the best out here, you will get a lot of information and support here. You are at the worst time in this ordeal, for lack of better phrasing it gets easier to deal with from here on out.. Like Beth said “no two people are the same and everyone responds and reacts differently to treatment“ (Everyone responds differently to suggestions has well.) ”Take your time digesting everything” Not knowing your brother no one can be specific in how to approach him. I will say the burden is all a hard on you. If you need questions answered, and you will, ask . Knowledge is helpful in control and we all need a little on that. Most folks here will echo that they never get enough info from the Doctors, start getting your reports, from the doctor, test and procedures. It makes decision making for future stuff far easier. The one single thing I learned and had the greatest importance for me is what Frank said, “You will be amazed at the number of survivors here that are fighting and making a mockery of the statistics and prognosis's”. The reality of what is happening is not what the mainstream puts out. Bo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shelliemacs Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 WELCOME now that being said, DO NOT, i repeat DO NOT go to the internet for information or statistics. we are now your second family and your source (outside of the oncologist) of information and especially HOPE. we all have it in an abundance to share with you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Treebywater Posted December 3, 2004 Share Posted December 3, 2004 Welcome!!! I'm new as well. My mother was just diagnosed with what may be Stage 2 or Stage 4 lung cancer as well. We'll know which way that swings after her PET scan next week. I sure can understand your fears... It's so overwhelming to be at the beginning of it. I imagine that it will be overwhelming all throughout in one way or another, but I'm so grateful to have stumbled onto this site! Here I have found one of the essential tools--Hope!!! I hope that your brother and my mother will both be two that will kick this stinking, rotten diseases butt and take names! Val Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Justakid Posted December 4, 2004 Share Posted December 4, 2004 Debbie - Welcome and sorry about your brother Ditto to what everyone else has said! I am also Stage 3, take a look at my bio below, maybe it will help answer some questions. One thing I learned, asside from everyone here is awesome is that it is important to have the right doctor! I learned the hard way. I now have a pro-active Doc and it makes all the difference in the world in the patients attitude! If there are any questions I can answer for you, feel free to PM me! I don't mind sharing my experience with all this. Oh yeah, it is scary as hell! Believe me, it's been almost 9mths and I am finally starting to "accept" this (is that the right word?). It's taken almost everyone here to convince me that I (it) will be OK and they have taught me how to "breath" through things (calm down take a deep breath and concentrate on the problem at hand). Keep us posted on your brother and good luck! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DeanCarl Posted December 4, 2004 Share Posted December 4, 2004 Welcome Debbie, I am sorry you had to seek us out ... but VERY glad that you found us. There is a TON of wonderful folks here with just about ever type and stage of this disease you can think of. No matter what the next few months bring for you and your brother someone here will probably have experienced the very same thing. A couple of things. One is to remember that, from the moment you found this site, no matter what happens you (and your brother) don't have to do any of this alone! Ya know all the things "I" can't handle? Well, "WE" can! The other thing is that I believe in the bottom of my heart that ATTITUDE IS EVERYTHING. As you can see from my sig I was dxd with Stage 3, inoperable cancer. I wasn't given a whole lot of time. Yet here it is, over a year later, and I'm still around causing hate and discontent amongst the masses! And that's without ANY treatment (except for palative (treating the pain and discomfort and such) at all!!! I firmly believe it's been my attitude that has made that difference. And remember, unlike the weather, attitude is a CHOICE! One we can make every day. So no more of that "victim" stuff. Your brother, from the moment of his diagnoses, is a cancer SURVIVOR. As I am and as so many others here are. Yes, it's a scary time. Yes, the road ahead can be pretty bumpy in spots. But thousands of folks have walked that road ahead of you and your brother and you can also. Praying for nothing but good news from here on out for the both of you. Dean Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J.C. Posted December 4, 2004 Share Posted December 4, 2004 Welcome Debbie, You will find a lot of information and so many shoulders all there for you, will leave the welcome mat for you. J.C. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kaffie Posted December 5, 2004 Share Posted December 5, 2004 Welcome Debbie I guess it's all been said, just want to add another welcome and prayer for you and your brother. Kathy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kimblanchard Posted December 5, 2004 Share Posted December 5, 2004 Like all the rest, I am sad that you needed to find us but happy that you did. I hope your brother's scan comes out as good as can be expected. And whatever the prognosis, they are statistics, and they are medians, and there is always a chance. Never give up hope. God bless. Curtis Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dadstimeon Posted December 5, 2004 Share Posted December 5, 2004 Welcome Debbie and sorry to hear about your brother. Prayers for your brother and you for the best of results. Rich Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ellakc2 Posted December 7, 2004 Share Posted December 7, 2004 Hey Debbie, I'm 15 months clean of stage3. Hang in there. You never know. Will keep you and your brother in my prayers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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