Jump to content

New to site


rmm17

Recommended Posts

Hi,

I am a 21 year old college student and my 40 yo. mother was diagnosed 2 days ago with cancer in her left lung. They are currently running tests to determine if it has spread elsewhere. So far they have said it is not in her brain. I am out of town currently so i cant be there to talk to the dr.'s and i'm worried she isnt understanding everything they are telling her. She starts chemo today. I am really scared b/c i read the lung cancer survival stats and they are not good. I also have two brothers that are only 17 and i am worried about how this will effect them. I just dont know what i should do/feel.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Welcome. I hope we can be of help. This is a hard road. I hope she has someone to go to appointments with her and take notes. It is all new and so emotional it is hard to "hear" all that is going on. She was diagnosed 2 days ago and is already starting chemo, wow are her doctors on the ball!. Keep us posted. Donna G

Link to comment
Share on other sites

You are at the scariest worst part.............it will get more comfortable for you, I promise.

Take a deep breath and forget the statistics. Your mom is a person not a number.

We are here for you and as you learn more about your mom's diagnosis you will begin to formulate questions. There are some very helpful experienced folks on this forum.

I am not so good at answering questions, but am great at supporting and cheerleading an praying.

Come often and tho I am sorry you had a need to find us............believe me you will be glad you did.

Best!

Pat

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi,

Let me give you some hope. I am a 3 1/2 year suvivor of Small Cell Limited LC. Forget the statistics, they are outdated and in this situation, each case is different.Your Mom is young and that works in her favor with this disease. Her doctors seem to be working quickly on her and that is very good. If she can have someone with her when she talks to the doctor, that is also good as she probably is very confused, upset, angry, and isn't listening at the moment. I remember that well. If she is computer savy, when she can, have her log in and read some of our stories - they will give her hope. Please let us know how she's doing. We care.

Joanie

Link to comment
Share on other sites

ugh, I am SO sorry. you're all too young to have to deal with this. chemo is happening fast, which is a good sign that the docs are pro-active. come here as much as you can, and ignore the stats. period. you'll get all the information and support you need here.

xoxo

bunny

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi,

Don't be concerned overly with statistics. They're derived from old data, by definition. Too much has happened in the last handful of years for old data to necessarily apply now.

I'm glad you mother's doctors have decided to be proactive about this. That is a good thing. Try to find someone to write down questions and answers, or to tape what the doctor says for you to hear later.

I'm sorry this comes while you're in college, I know that's a busy time, but I'm glad your mom has a concerned daughter.

Keep coming back, and keep us posted.

XOXOXOX

MaryAnn

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Welcome! Glad you have found this site, because it is full of support and info. As others have said, statistics are just averages and old averages at that. Each person is inidivual. My wife's statistics said she would live 8 months, and she is presently a 3-year survivor, and still going. Take heart. Don

Link to comment
Share on other sites

So, you'll note a trend: probably everyone here will advise you not to bother with the statistics. It's not that we are all ignorant of what''s out there, but we see (and read about) amazing progress everyday.

Like you, I was worried when my mom was first diagnosed, and I was briefly obsessed by the numbers. Go to the Survivors section, and see how the other half is living! This board offers so much hope.

I'm sorry you had to seek us out, but you've come to a good place. Keep us posted on your Mom.

:) Kelly

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I am so glad that you found this site-

Someone suggested that your mom have someone go to appts with her- great idea- whenwe took Rachel, my friend w/lung cancer, we also took along a micro recorder and recorded the appts. This allowed us to play back what the Doctor said later when we felt so overwhelmed.....it really helped-and if you can't be there, you can "hear" what the doctor has to say-

You will find so much support here as I have- Our prayers are with you and your family-

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Your reaction to the news is exactly the way I felt too. It is hard to think clearly...but after the initial shock wears down you'll begin to do what you have to do. Please, please, please don't worry about the statistics. It will only bring you down and your Mother needs you to be optimistic. Attitude and frame of mind is so important. Let her know you are there for her and let everything else fall into place.

Please keep us posted.....and remember that we are here when you need us.

Melinda

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi

I too was overwelmed with the statistics when mum was diagnosed in march of this year...then I went to every survivor story I could find and believe me, there are a lot of them! I printed them out and give them to mum for reading...she loves them!

I am glad that you found this site, I was overawed by the support and genuine care that all at this site give.

Glad to hear they have started your mum on chemo straight away...Hope all goes well for you, your mum and your brothers...I will keep you in my thoughts.

Jenny

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi and welcome.. ignore the statistics. They are nothing but a distraction. Your mom needs to have someone go with her to the appointments. Using the tape recorder is a good idea. Your mom should ask for copies of all medical reports and keep her own file. It could come in handy later, once she is more savvy about her lung cancer, in making treatment choices or visiting other docs, or maybe comparing notes with others on this site. As has been said, your mom, you and the rest of your family are going through the worse times now. It will get better as she garners hope and follows a plan. There is lots of hope.

Don M

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi,

Sorry you had to find us, but you have found the best support and knowledgable group here.

I am sorry about the news of your mom. She is so young. But being young has its advantage as she should have good lung breathing capacity because of her age.

I always stress this, as it is so important. Do not, I repeat DO NOT listen to stastistics as those odds have be beaten time and time again. You will read posts from people here who were given 6 months, and now 3, 4 6, 10 years later they are still with us and will continue to do so. Like one of our members said, it is up to the individual. Those stastics you heard or read about are outdated like Joanie mentioned.

You all are so scared right now, but that will change as your mom starts treatment. She will learn to accept it and will fight, she must fight. That is half the battle to fight and keep a postive attitude that she can and will beat this thing.

Someone should go with her to her doctors office and keep a diary, of what the doc says, the treatments and any questions she may want to ask alredy written down, so she won't forget to ask when she is there.

I know this is hard for you to be away at college and not be there for her. Being a mom, I know that she wants you to stay and keep up with your studies. Just keep in contact with her, which I am sure you will. Can one of your brothers or both go with her to her appointments, or another relative, friend or neighbor?

Keep us informed of her progress, And know, honey, we are always here to answer your questions, give support and send prayers. You can also vent any time. We all have done that, and it helps to get it out and not keep it in.

Things will get better, try not to worry and concentrate on your school work.

Take care and I will send prayers to you mom.

Maryanne

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Welcome to this site...my husband Bob was diagnosed this year and we have a daughter who is also away at college...and one who was in Berlin when he was daignosed on a year long fellowship....and I ached when we told them....and I ache for you. You say you are away...Is there anyway you can get home just to see her? That really helpd my girls. I would guess this is scary for you, but as others have said...the statistics are just that...statistics. There are plenty of great stories out there and your mom is a unique individual. I'll be praying for you both...Diane

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Welcome to the best support community on the net for lung cancer. We are a family of friends that care very much about eachother and help and support as much as we can. You will get many answers here and grow to love and care about everone here as they do you!!

I am so sorry about you're Mom and when you have more information about staging etc I am sure you will get lots of replies. Hang in there, take a deep breath and know that we are here for you.

God bless,

Jane

Link to comment
Share on other sites

My daughter was in college when I was diagnosed also. I know that she felt helpless. Like everyone else said, don't listen to the statistics. I did the same thing when I was diagnosed and it did nothing but bring me down. It has been proven that a positive attitude helps. Your positive attitude will help your Mom have a positive attitude. Glad you found this site though. Read the "My Stories" and you will find much hope.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Welcome.

Read through the archive of posts on this site - you'll find lots of reasons to feel a little less scared and a little more confident that you'll be able to get through this and also be a great help to your mom and brothers, even if you cannot be right there physically.

I was diagnosed in early January with stage IV NSCLC. After I got done reading the gloomy statistics, I was sure I wouldn't be around to enjoy Christmas this year. Eight months later, I feel great and I have every reason to hope I'll be here NEXT Christmas! New treatments are in the works and there is reason to hope!

Sending caring thoughts and strength your way,

Leslie

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use.