Treebywater

I'm so sorry to read this. Please know that we care.

THANK YOU for the update. Please let her know how much we care!

Don, I'm so sorry to hear this, but I'm glad to hear that the doc has another plan. Tell Lucie we're pulling for her.

Peggy, I do relate and understand. Every little removal stings. For me--I have been so short with telemarketers. IT seems like every week 2 or 3 call the house and ask for "Carol." I try to be a little black humorist and shock them by telling them that she's dead... or that there won't be a more convenient time... ever.... But really that little reminder every single time stings. Seems like it's little things that I don't prepare myself for that hurt the most--and big things too. I hate it all. ((((Peggy))))

Oh Sue... My heart just sank when I read this. I'm so sorry. I hurt with you and for you. I'm just so sorry.

Lor--You sound heartbroken every time you mention the nursing home. You do... And if she's having to sit in her own waste she's not getting the BEST care that she could get... I don't think this should be about placacting your step father even if it pisses him off... This needs to be about your Mom and what YOU can have peace with as a daughter. And from experience--the 'noisey kids' will be a welcome sound for your Mom. Much better than the unsettling impersonal sounds of a nursing home. Hang in there. You WILL Find a way through this.

((((Sue))))) Praying for you both.

Fay's grit and grace reminded me of my Mama from day 1. I hope they get to meet sometime soon.... But I ache so to have lost them both.

Still praying, Rich! Ry--thank you SO MUCH for keeping us posted.

Oh no! I am praying!

I'm so glad she came through it ok, Lori!!! Keep us posted!

((((Sandy)))))

Fay--I want to be like you when I grow up. Peace to you on this journey...

Holy Camole!

Oh... I was nice in the reply.... I just told her the day... and answered her other questions and was chit-chatty. I guess I'm just grateful she's not a mind reader.

Mix. Cut. I've always been intimidated by the fork twirl technique, and I've never been a good noodle slurper. Carolyn prefers to just stuff her spaghetti in her mouth any way she can. She's already a good slurper.

I am about to show you what a very bad person I can be. My Mother-in-law emailed me today to ask me when Carolyn's birthday is. She will be a year old next month. It made me SO ANGRY. I have my share of "Mother-in-law issues" anyway... and this just seemed to be one more example of her just not THINKING... And I realized as I was thinking about why I was *So ANGRY* that I'm really struggling with not feeling resentful that she gets to be the Gramma... and my Mom does not. My Mom would have been the cool Gramma. My Mom would have, as my Daddy just said, spent thousands of dollars just to go see Carolyn and any other grandchildren I may bring into the world anytime she wanted just because she needed a 'grandbaby fix.' She'd have been the one to talk to them about anything--even things that Gramma's aren't 'supposed' to talk about. She would have taught them to laugh at life and to be strong. She'd have taught Carolyn to know that women are strong and can do so much and should have the opportunity to make choices. And she's not here. Now... I know my MIL will have many things to offer Carolyn as well... But I get so frustrated as it is about how thoughtless she can be towards my husband (her son). I think she will be a very sweet Gramma when she is around Carolyn, and I know Carolyn will care for her a lot. But it's hard to not just feel resentful. It just seems unfair. They should BOTH be able to be Gramma.... Especially since MY MOM would have been the COOL Grandma. Ok. I'll go back to trying not to be catty now.

Fay--I want to celebrate the amazingness of you now while you can hear how much we love you. I'm sure your family is doing that as well. You ARE amazing, Fay.

Praying... I'm very sorry to hear this. If you speak with Karen again, please give her love from us.

Oh Lori... I just wish I could come help you somehow. I don't have any advice... Just my support and love to you and your Mom.

I'm just so sorry.

Oh Sue... I'm so sorry things are looking so awful. I ache with you both and I'm praying for you. ((((((Sue)))))) ((((((Mike))))))

I just wish I could come and just sit with you for a while, Fay. I really do. You are very much loved.

Beth--it sounds like things are just lining up the way that they need to. I am praying that this will be a peaceful, healing trip for you.

Erin, I'm so very sorry. Your posts just break my heart. I can understand the irony of dealing with death right before big things happen. My grandpa died a month to the day before my wedding. My grandma died 2 weeks before my daughter was born. My Mom died when my daughter was only 4 months old and one month before my husband's first deployment. It seems like so much to happen all at once. Please be gentle with yourself. I know it hurts... and I know you want to sit in your hurt. That is ok. You will do what you have to do... just because you have to. But don't 'should on yourself' too much. There are actually quite a few of us girls here who lost a mother either right before or soon after giving birth... It's hard. It hurts in so many ways. Your joy is double-edged. You are so happy about the dear child you hold, but so haunted by the fact that your Mama isn't there to share it with you. We're here, and we'll support you. Many, many (((((hugs))))) to you. Take it a second at a time for now.