Nick C

Ned, not 100% sure how long he served for, but I believe he is retired from "something else" These are ke questions to go back to my friend with. Randy Thanks for the links...I'm forwarding them now.

Gosh Barb, I can't beleive it. A year. We know the anguish and will continue to stand with you.

All, my mothers neighbor and friend let me know her dad has cancer. First they thought it was lung, but turns out lung was the met and it was colon as the primary. To the question, they are giving him chemo pills and they are $3,800 a month. He is a vet and retired...what avenues should he take to get some sort of benefits to defray the costs? Thanks, I know some of you know the answer.

I remember the grief before the grief. It is hard because you know things are changing and you don't want them to. I too am my mother's only child. I was very devoted and feared life without her like you wouldn't believe. The hope I'd impart to you is you will move forward through these days with her and the days (which are hopefully far off) without her, because that is what we do. But she will never feel distant from you, her place in your heart is hers forever. Don't get me wrong, I'd prefer my mother be here with me. I sure could use her presence every single day. But I now move though life with her on my mind and my heart until I see her again. In the mean time I try to bring the bests part of her out of me as often as I can. Enjoy your days...As my mom said, "don't live every day like it is your last, live it like it is your first." Enjoy the day not in desperation but in the joy and wonder you would have as if this were the first.

If you need help posting photos feel free to PM me, I'll hit you with instruction or an e-mail you can mail photos to, and I'll usually post them within 24 hours. Thanks.

I am very sorry. My condolences to her family.

I am so sorry. Reading what you have written really hit me, just about every single thing you wrote. Because I've been there too. I am just so sorry.

Ihope for answers for you soon. I feel like I asked this before, but did they do an x-ray/spiral ct?

I'm glad he was honored. And I am happy you and your mom supported eachother through it.

Great pics

I am very sorry.

A great part about here is you never have to "feel weird" about coming back. That's how life is and I think everyone here gets it. I'm sure it's been a long hard 4 months. You mom was far too young. I am so sorry.

Anger... I've kept anger as a companion for over 2 years now. And it rears it head in the most unusual ways. Some have said "let it go". I can't. I have no question mom was angry that this happened. Angry with herself. Angry with doctors who every year told her everything was fine. I know I am angry that I know this was chosen for me. I beleive that it was. Because I would know what to do about it. To be obedient to the life that was put in front of me...doesn't mean I have to like it. I am angry for Sophie. She is loved and I think I can tell that she can tell. But how much more would she be loved by my mom. And now she doesn't get that...and that pisses me off. And I am angry at mom too. Not at her the person. I love her. But "mother" is supposed to be here at this time in my life and she is ALWAYS supposed to be here. And she is not...at least not in the way I'd prefer. And so that makes me angry. She wasn't supposed to go. Basically. I SO get it.

Don't apologize for length...it actually helps us to understand best. I say an ounce of prevention. Perhaps limit your exposure until you feel better. And if you need to be with her and helping out, hey, do the mask thing. Most colds and what not are transferred by droplets...the masks do I good job of containg those. And hand washing is HUGE!!!

Nice

It may be yeast...I seem to recall thee doc saying somethhing about that with my mom.

Me too...thoughts are with you.

Hope it's nothing, but good to hear the appoinjtment is on the way...peace of mind

Good luck Teri.

False disgusting!!!! The person below me loves sushi

Re: the insurance, Life coverage through work is typically not paid by the employee unless they elect additional coverage during open enrollment, if it was just the company sponsored coverage I would think at the option of the company that coverage could come and go...now the differentiation between being employed and out on disability...I don't know if typically that entitles you to all the rigths and privleges of the rest of the employees or not. Re: Shock and numbness...it's only been a week...things may change many times for you, don't feel like you need to be on a timetable...it's tough and unpredictable Re; the gym, a very healthy way to fill your time. Re: Smoking...not your fault...it's a very hard habit to break. Don't we all do things we KNOW aren't good for us...Heck, I just had a piece of cold pizza...I know I should be having an apple...But anyone here would encourage you when you do go down the path of quitting.

I'm so sorry, it is a lonely situation to be in...sometimes it is more lonely even with all the people you have around because they aren't living up to what you need. I thinnk a lot of people here get it.