Nick C

Hey Joanie. So far about $6400 has found its way to IELCAP in Mom's memory. With this kind of momentum, we want to keep this at the front of the minds of the people in this community. So we are thinking of starting a foundation. We have thus far seen the Lung Cancer Alliance and IELCAP as worthy causes to fund, as well as ACGT for genetic cancer research. But we want to do our homework...find all the best research being done. I have to contact Lungevity as well. See what they are up to. Also, from a personal standpoint, we are writing letters: to our paper, I am writing one to my mother's hometown paper. I am also drafting an open letter to doctors who send patients for the chest x-ray to explain that this is protocol, but inform the patient that 85% of the time the x-ray shows clear when in fact there is something. If I were the patient, that would prompt me to say "WHAT? Then what else can I do?" An informed patient is one in control of thier health. Also, we are going to any public meetings in the vicinity about lung cancer or cancer in general to challenge the medical professionals about detection. I'll post on my recent exchange soon. I'm full of pis_ and vinegar today. You'll have to excuse me.

Hello all, Keri and I have discovered the research of I-ELCAP as some promising research in the field of lung cancer detection and feel lives may be saved by the research being done there. I was hoping that some of you may have had exposure to similar studies, not neccesarily around CT screening, but any type of detection research being done (whether is be blood test, saliva, other screening etc.) and if you could share the info on "where and who and what". Thanks all. And any other research is huge to hear about too. But it seems that if we can't catch it early, all the other stuff becomes a lot less effective...

Lord, Please give Steve and his entire family peace and comfort. And all else who need it. Amen.

Sis, It's too much. I know. I'll pray for her.

Sweet!

The tax in California was unfortunately doomed from the start. The tax included monies for every intiative under the sun until the initiatives which should have been funded (lung cancer for one) got lost in the shuffle. The tax got too big because everyone wanted a slice of the action and a good measure went down in flames. Hopefully one day the law makers propose a tax in California where the proceeds only go to smoking related disease...period. But we'll see. Baby steps folks.

Saw that on Nip Tuck. It is not consistent with my experience nor anyone elses here. But that's why you should keep hollywood out of your medical and political decisions...it's not reality...but too many people think it is.

Done.

Hey...I've heard stuff like this. My mom was a huge believer in stuff like that when she was still here. I think it could VERY WELL have been a sign.

crystle, Wow, this sounds like quite the challenge. Can you call her doctor and prod him to get in touch with the rehab facility and find out who there is charged with her care? I found sometimes the loud care giver gets the response. It is not neccesarily right that that is the case, but nonetheless that might be what needs to be done. You may also want to ask for a copy of her medical records. If they give you a hard time, again the loud take no answer but the one you want caregiver. Hammer home the point that her records aren't transferring to where they should be so you are going to make sure all bases are covered. And don't leave and keep in their faces until they do so. It is frustrating. And your mom getting "lost in the shuffle" isn't right. But when that type of thing happened with mom, I made sure to just care for her, even if it meant doing someone elses job...and then said I'll catch up with those that didn't do their job later.

Oh Lisa, it is OK, that you haven't gotten around to some of those things. You don't have to. And don't worry what some people think. People, I have found, just don't get it. Don't know what to say. Don't see how your life doesn't just get back on track. But I get it. Take your time. I cry every time I go to mom's house. And the cable is still on Her glasses are where she left them the night before she died. So is her watch. Her to do list is still on the counter...but I finished the list for her. I get it.

It is great that each person here "knows". And we'll keep knowing. And I am sure months, years from now, when I am having a "moment", many in my life won't understand...but here, I know folks will. And won't find it odd that I'm not better yet. It's such a blessing that this wonderful loving community has been born out of such a crappy situation. See, God truly does make the light emerge from darkness!

Oh Kat, I don't know what to say. I'm sorry doesn't seem enough. I've just said a prayer that God is with you and you feel his presence. I just don't know what else to say or do. So sorry.

Awesome! As much as an ulcer can be...

Post away. I get it!! I do. And I'm so sorry.

First I am very sorry. It is confusing how one minute everything is fine and the next...well you know. The doctors have a way of seeing a brain lesion and having an idea of based on how it looks where it originated from. My mother's lung tumor was relatively small...but it had travelled by the time we found it. (similar issue with motor function). Time lines are funny things. You just don't know. I saw one hospital treated over 100 brain met patients, the bell curve for that hospital was 1 month to 40 months with an average with treatment of 5 point something months. Most here will say the stats mean nothing. And I both agree and disagree. I agree that they mean NOTHING to the amount of time the patient actually has, much like the "average male in the US lives to be 73 means nothing to me or MY survival. But in planning what to do both for the care giver and the patient, you may want to "act" and be vigilant accordingly. Know there is a health issue with potential for a rapid progression but at the same time there is potential for a "long" quality survival. I pray for strength for all involved.

Terrye, Terrye, why? You didn't make your mom sick. You aren't the one who is operating. You can't blame yourself or take credit for any eventuality. My experience, you have to let her decide. My role was to make sure her decision was made with ALL the information available. And then she made the call. When she finally decided, I wept like crazy. Any decision she made I would NEVER be comfortable with because I wasn't comfortable with the situation period. But today, I have no "I should haves". She called the shots. I gave her the support to do so. I do not have the same "medical situation" so I can't really help you there. But I wanted to share my "child with a parent with a difficult decision" perspective. If your mom is missing a key piece of info in her decision making, then make sure she has it...but she will decide, and whatever that decision is, support it. I have to tell you my experience here. Mom was not sure what to do. And what she needed to hear from me was "I support your decision no matter what." However I followed it with "But whatever your decision, please know I will cry like a baby when that day comes, because none of it is the answer I want." And when she decided we sat down, she told me how she wanted to proceed and I wept. But today, Mom is gone but I bare none of the "I should haves". She ran the show. But she made no decisions based on fear of And definitely talk to the surgeon. I would think he/she would at least have an idea of what the surgery would be like prior to the actual incision. There is too much screening technology out there not to have a good idea of size and location and what the procedure would entail...I would think.

Lisa, I'm so very sorry. It sounds like the caring you and the rest of the family provided was very special. God Bless, Nick

I am so sorry. So many here have gone through/are going through what you are going through and are here to support. Your Dad is at peace. May you find some peace of your own during this time. Again, so sorry.

Today is the day..what is the deal?

I understand how the joyous things will always have "something missing". We haven't gotten there yet as it hasn't been long. But I expect that we will feel much the same. I'm so sorry.

I tried to post yesterday, and everytime I started I fell apart. We bought a small garden statue yesterday...an angel. When we went back to Mom's house the day she died, she had a sign on the front door which my wife pointed at. It said "in the garden". She loved the garden. We think that's where we'll "find" her. So we found a temporary spot for the angel, but when spring comes we'll move her to a more permanent spot surrounded with flowers (no yellow flowers, blue and purple and ones that smell nice). Damn I miss her. I'm basically writing all this here because a day like yesterday would have ended in a call to Mom to tell her all the work outside I did. I miss being able to make that call. Mom, I miss you, this has been the longest month of my life.

Grace, I'm sending prayers to you. I know this must be a hard time for you.

Amen.

Toon. I am so very sorry, for you, your grandmother, your mom and your aunt. That was so sudden. As too many of us have learned it can be. You were a very good grandchild and showed a lot of love by making sure you understood all that was going on. So sorry.