bunny Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 it's like I want to pretend that the LC never happened, even as I am so proud of Suki and what she lived through. I never come here any more, and this place and EVERYone here is ALWAYS on my mind. I am doing the advocacy work I wanted to, but it's almost like I wish the cancer could be out of sight, out of mind. which is baloney on so many levels: Suki is still on Tarceva, she's on a six month scan schedule and even though she's NED, it's never really gone, is it!? and I feel so selfish, because I feel strongly that I should be here for people who come in scared and confused as I was, but I get this weird sick feeling when I come back to the site. I lurk, but haven't been on here regularly since probably March or April. so now, in addition to everything else, I feel like an *ss because I feel like I've let you down, and all the people who've come on since I sort of disappeared. is this normal, or am I just selfish? I mean, there's plenty of other stuff happening: Dave's surgery went well but his recovery has been longer and slower than we thought it would be. I had my own medical adventures in June and July but am fine now. I do have one very amazing thing to tell you all, but, again, I feel a little embarassed, since I've been gone so long - Suki and I got to do one of the first things I was afriad we never would when she was diagnosed again last year: on Friday, we shopped for my wedding dress. no matter how flaky I get, you are always always always in my heart, LCSCers. Amie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kasey Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 Glad you stopped in to let us know what was going on, Amie. Ya know, we all just gotta take this ride the way we gotta take it, and it is different for all of us. I must admit when you didn't answer PM's I was pretty worried. I am thrilled you are shopping for a wedding dress. Are you going to tell us when the wedding will be??? Perhaps a 'shower' is in order, huh ? On a serious note now, I'm glad Dave has been coming around since surgery.......back troubles can be quite debilitating. Happy you are all straightened out too. I am very glad you can move on and make future plans. I feel certain that not one of us here can harbor any resentment when one is able to leave 'cancer' behind! That is probably the goal of everyone here. Hope you stop in once in a while to say 'hey', and wedding pics would sure be appreciated!! Take care, Kasey Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Treebywater Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 Did I hear you say wedding dress????? AH YEAH!!!!!!!! Amie--You ARE NOT being selfish. You are living your life. That is a GOOD THING. You aren't forgetting us, you are just focusing on other things right now. We get that. We support that. We are ok with that. (I meant to say all this in a reply PM or email a long time ago.... sorry!). I miss my West Wing buddy... but there are other ways for me to find you--I just need to get up off my own duff and do so! You give the Sukster a hug from me and tell her I am delighted that she got to help you shop for a wedding dress. love, Val Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joanie55 Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 AIMIE !!!!!!! I'M SOOOO happy for you. WHOOOOOOOOOOOO. Did you pick a date? I may be able to be a help as you know i'm also on the wedding merry-go-round. PM me. I'm also very glad Suki is doing well and of course, you and Dave. You left out one very important thing you've been working on. The Lung Cancer Walk for New York. Always glad to hear from you, but don't you worry. It's NOT "out of site, out of mind". Joan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Connie B Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 What? You have a LIFE OUT SIDE LCSC??? Are you kidding me????? That's the BEST NEWS OF ALL! Sitting here at LCSC isn't going to get you married, so I'm sure glad you took time away and went on with your life! (as it should be)! SO WHEN IS THE WEDDING???? It's just nice to hear that things are going SO WELL for you and mom (Suki) and Dave. Sorry Dave's recovery isn't going as well as you hoped for, but time will heal! So, stop being whiny about not being here and be HAPPY YOU ARE ABLE TO ENJOY YOUR LIFE! You Go Girlfriend! Just stop by now and then and say hi and let us know how your all doing. (((((AMIE))))))) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Don M Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 Congratulations on your impending wedding Amie. I understand how you feel about wanting to put lc out of your mind. I tend to keep it at arms length. Sometimes I don't post for a while and then I come back. I expect that I will post less and less if I have beat it this time. I don't think it is selfish. It is part of the healing. Don M Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andrea Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 Not selfish at all!!!! I think we all go through phases like that, I know I did!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shineladysue Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 Amie, I hope you find the world's most beautiful wedding dress and your day will be so so perfect. It's so good to hear from you and hearing good news is better yet. As for being selfish, I don't think that is possible for you. Amie,I think most of us go through phases of just wanting to put lung cancer out of our lives. I have put in for a hall pass once or twice to ask for time away, but I haven't been able to stay away for very long. I just feel so much a part of all of you. There is a special bond here among all of us that noone else can understand. It's the kind of bond that even when you take the time away, you know you can always come back to arms open wide and full of love and understanding. God be with you Aime and keep us informed of all the good things in your life. Love, Sue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frank Lamb Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 Amie,wow it is really good to hear from you.I.m glad to hear Suki is doing ok and Dave is on the mend. With that said a great big CONGRATULATIONS to you. My next bud lite will be in toast to you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Don Wood Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 Hi, Amie, and welcome back. So good to hear your news and that of Suki and David. You need to do what is best for you and I think you are doing that. I have learned over the years that I can't do everything, so I do what I can. Your wedding news is great and I am excited for you. Take care. Don Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geri Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 First of all congratulations, a wedding is certainly a reason for us all to celebrate. As far as getting on with life, I for one think it's wonderful that you're moving on. All of us strive to be able to put cancer on the back burner and if coming here delays that process not one us will fault you for wanting to go forward. My family moved on a long time ago and were able to put the "iminent danger" thoughts out of their minds, this gave me a real sense of relief and maybe this is Suki's feeling too. While my wellbeing is certainly on their list it's not their first priority any more and I don't want it to be - it reasures me that I don't have to be so concerned either. I don't know if that last bit makes any sense Amie, just go out there and find that dress and check in with us once in while........we will need wedding details so that we can all live vicariously through your posts). Take care, Geri Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MilliBr1 Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 Congratulations on your engagement! I'm busy planning my daughters wedding, so I know how thrilled your mom is to be here and help with yours. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jyoung20 Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 Hey Amie, I have missed you!!! I am so happy to hear of your engagement. HOORAY FOR SUKI!!! GOD BLESS!! J-me Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kreed70 Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 Congratulations!!! I hope that my mom will be able to look for a dresses w/ me if a.) it is God's will for me to be married and b.) My being on eHarmony works out!! I know the guilty feeling of being away too long while trying to forget!! It all good!! Glad you are feeling better, Dave is well again, Suki is NED and you are are getting married!!! Please let me know how the NY walk planning is going. Pittsburgh needs one!! Kelly Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ry Posted September 3, 2006 Share Posted September 3, 2006 Aime- Congratulations on the upcoming wedding. As only one helper on the Boston walk I am almost positive that one cannot get a walk and a wedding off in the same year end. If that is the case, please consider forming a New York team and join us in our walk (see Debi's post in General). It will save you all the work, and still raise money for a great cause. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cindi o'h Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 So excited to hear from you, Bunny. All good news. Congrats all around. Glad you got rid of that evil twin. ( ) love, Cindi o'h Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sharyn Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 Amie.... Congrats girl friend... I don't know which news is more exciting... that Suki is helping you shop for a wedding dress, or THAT YOU ARE SHOPPING FOR A WEDDING DRESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Your post was a relief for me to read as I find myself drifting away from here for longer periods of time... and i feel guilty the same way you do.... I guess we all move forward huh? Anyway, your news is amazing and I am so glad everything is on an upswing... I want to hear wedding details... I LOVE WEDDING DETAILS>>>>>.... Love, Sharon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kamataca Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 OK...all will be forgiven when you post a pic of you in that dress! Seriously, couldn't be happier for you. Think of it this way: when I first came here, scared and lonely, you helped me out so much. I'm trying to pass that on...hopefully I've helped someone. You have left a legacy here with many of us, and we still love you, and are so happy for Suki! Come when you can, and ditch the guilt when you don't. Guilt is sooooo 2005, you know. Kelly Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maryanne Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 Hi Bunny, Welcome back here! You can see how much you were missed. We were talking about you on our chat last Tuesday and wondering how you were. You must be physic. I am glad that Dave's surgery is behind him and he is doing well and the same with you. Great news that Suki is doing great. I know the feeling about those CT scans, the are so stressful, but Iam confident Suki will come through with flying colors. Now for the important stuff.... WHEN IS THE WEDDING!!! That is such great news. Never feel guilty about leaving as we all go through times like that. You may come and go as you like. You have been such an inspiration here and I know how it is to need a break. Plus you had so much that has happened. So glad that is all behind you now and you can concentrate on your wedding. Missed you and glad you checked in with the good news. Maryanne Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bunny Posted September 4, 2006 Author Share Posted September 4, 2006 this place is just the most miraculous group of people I know. I am sorting out all the details, we have been planning all the details for months without a date. we conifirmed that the Ireland contingent could make it for November 30, 2006, which they can, so we're all systems go now. I know, it's soon - I am not p/g (yet), we're just tired of waiting. so November 30, 2006, we'll be getting married here http://www.thefoundry.info with me in this dress www.siriinc.com/bg-9590 only in a luscious satin and with some body in it, not like the model. it's a budget wedding, so I am looking forward to lots of "DIY" with family and friends, which I think is going to be a lot of fun. and although I told him I didn't need an engagement ring, David the Irish apparently has something up his sleeve...more will be revealed I guess. we're certainly backing into this - I got the dress on Fri., set the date on Sun., and will get the e-ring sometime before the wedding. I WILL keep you posted, and will also update the board soon on the status of the NYC walk. wedding aside, we've hit a few glitches. thanks again, love to you all. bunny Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patkid Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 oh Bunny Oh Bunny Oh Bunny Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Connie22 Posted September 4, 2006 Share Posted September 4, 2006 Bunny- I love the place that you are getting married, it has a lot of charm. You will look fabulous in that wedding dress. Congrats and Good luck! Connie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geri Posted September 5, 2006 Share Posted September 5, 2006 What a beautiful dress! Can't wait to see pictures of you in it. The Foundry looks fascinating, a wonderful place to be married. Good luck with all your preparations, my daughter got married last July with 3 months notice so I can relate to your to-do list. Take a deep breath, you'll get it all done! Geri Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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