Patkid Posted December 8, 2007 Share Posted December 8, 2007 Okay, I am not really serious but ............................. (well maybe I am?) I HAVE HAD IT I am not the type to live alone. I am putting myself up for adoption. On the plus side: I have finally quit smoking again. I have that battle won. It has been long enough now that I am used to the cravings and just move on ......................no biggie at last unfortunatly the process has added another 10 pounds on top of my 17 pounds of grief weight. I had to buy larger clothing...............................you can only imagine what that did to me emotionally. I fell while walking PJ .................No serious damage but scarry and I am pretty slow moving and sore ........... A light bulb 'blew up'. Now, I don't mean burned out ~ I mean it blew apart and left the metal part in the socket and glass on the floor.....................What a mess. Thank God it was in the upstairs hall so PJ nor I walked in it. You should have heard it! (This happened in this house one other time, but Brian was here............so I barely noticed it) There is ice on my deck and front porch. The neighbors have been so kind about plowing the drive way and shoveling walks......................but I can not get to the mail box unless I drive cuz there is a coating of ice and the driveway is slick, the front porch is solid ice and the back deck is buried. The furnace is making a banging noise. It is snowing AGAIN My toilet in the little bathroom is leaking somewhere and I can't tell what it is. My job sucks and they have really decreased our insurance coverage and increased the cost. They have stopped accumulating any further pension dollars. We are all under one threat after another. (another plus is that my review was good, but who cares?) They are restructuring our pay for next year...........who knows what the hell that means? I am in over my head trying to keep up with this house and there has not been one single offer since I listed it for sale. I am not tolerating the cold well at all. I miss Brian. I miss Brian I miss Brian I am going to tie a hundred dollar bill around my neck and post my pic on Craig's list as free to a good home or Will cook/clean and worry in return for a clean place to stay or Free Shih Tzu ~ comes w/ toys, food, and master Or live in babysitter/cook/ and bottle washer ARGHHHHHHH thanks for listening. I am sure things will look better tomorrow and I do love that I can write this to you. But I am just so sad and so scared and so very alone. P Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lilyjohn Posted December 8, 2007 Share Posted December 8, 2007 I've been there and done that at least most of it. As it turns out I'm quite comfortable alone. I still miss Johnny with every breath I take but living alone is no big deal for me. No more worries now about all of the other things. Something breaks I call the landlord. Now don't try to change that light yourself while you are alone. Don't need any of that kind of falls Here is a hint. A carot will remove the metal left from the light and not cut or electicute the one doing it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Connie B Posted December 8, 2007 Share Posted December 8, 2007 ((((((((((({PAT)))))))))))) I have never lost a spouse to death, but I sure can relate to most of what you have said. I remember having some of those problems too! They SUCK! We're going through some ishy stuff here too. Hubby in pain and rough shape, me facing surgery, missing my son for the holidays, hating this cold weather, etc, etc, etc. Hope your days will be brighter for you soon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patkid Posted December 8, 2007 Author Share Posted December 8, 2007 I love you guys. I am looking forward to selling this house and renting or buying something that comes w/ maintenance. Good grief I hate being such a whine~y wus. Tomorrow will be better.........hopefully for all of us. Love P Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kasey Posted December 8, 2007 Share Posted December 8, 2007 Okay, Pat. I've got the $100 and you are welcome to live here with us and Teddy and PJ too!!!!!! You will NOT have to cook or clean, but the worry you could provide we sure could use!!!!! And just so you know.....I miss Brian too . Wish you were closer, Pat. We cpuld make it work, I'm sure! Hope the new day looks better. Love, Kasey Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patkid Posted December 9, 2007 Author Share Posted December 9, 2007 arghh I just typed a big long post about my idea of a satelite home/arrangement ...............long story and I can not retype right now But suffice it to say: THANK YOU. Run really fast and really far, kasey if you see a wiggly lumpy package on your front porch!! Hugs. P Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Treebywater Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 Maybe we should auction you off, Pat.... Cause I'd adopt you in a heartbeat!!!!! (((((hugs))))) to you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blueeye Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 I'm sorry. When it rains, it pours. Er um, I mean snows it blows! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J.C. Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 Pat, My door and place is open to you, Just a day and some sunshine and you will feel better, you are not alone we all feel the same way often. Take care good days ahead. Love Jackie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patkid Posted December 9, 2007 Author Share Posted December 9, 2007 Okay, Imagine this: A central pod (like a dome home) housing gathering space, kitchen/dining/ library, laundry ~ then surrounding the main pod: smaller pods housing bed/bathrooms. You could always find your privacy and alone time/but you could always find togetherness, hugs and sharing That just sounds like heaven to me. If I ever become rich (ha) I would build that and invite folks to join the commune type family. There would be no rules other than KINDNESS, TOLERANCE AND CONSIDERATION. Being the mom of 3 wonderful boys (men) it is a bit different than being the mom of the mom........My grandkids think I am TOPS and I always try to butt out and never cause problems so that their moms will always welcome me. I love my sons beyond words but oh the joy of a daughter...........I can only imagine. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kasey Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 Okay, Pat......I'm IN!!!! Sounds doable and agreeable. Let's plan on it!!!!!! Of course ~ place for our pooches, right???? Man, how I wish it could be. Kasey Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patkid Posted December 9, 2007 Author Share Posted December 9, 2007 cont'd (I did not want to lose my typing again) Brian's girls are nice, but our closeness wanes as Brian's possessions and $$ are nearly all distributed. (Christine, I guess I deserve the cynical adjective for a bit) I always knew how the girls were.................they were very spoiled and very self centered. Brian had raised them alone since they were ages 2 and 6 mos. He told me that he was always trying to make up to them that they did not have a mom in their lives............and they learned to play that card w/ him. It is what it is. They are not mean, just self absorbed and aloof. It is okay. I love them as they are not as they should be. Anyway. Here I am ~ a gardener ~ with no one to tend......... I hope this pity party ends tonight and that as Jackie reminds me. Tomorrow ......... Love you guys P Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Suzie Q Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 Kasey, I up the ante! You will have to see my bid and raise to get Pat! Sorry, Pat. We have snow here in MI, too, but we have a plowing service and DH does the shoveling. Does dishes too. AND we are minutes away from Rockford, MI! How do you like that? As a side note, DH and I weere in Rockford for the WWII Days at the park with the historic village (I have forgotten the name) in September. Rockford is a very nice city. Sorry you are feeling blue. Sounds like you need a plumber and electrician. Better to get it done now and not have it be a detraction from selling the house. Thinking of you! Hugs, karen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MsC1210 Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 Pat You can borrow my cynical side anytime. It WILL get better and brighter and remember... my offer is always open~ Hugs my dear Christine Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patkid Posted December 9, 2007 Author Share Posted December 9, 2007 SusieQ, Was that at Midway Village? I walk there. It is close to my home. We are almost neighbors!! Plus my corp hdqtrs are in Troy. P Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barbb Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 Pat, I signed on because I am so darn depressed today and yours is the first post I read and I just burst into tears. I yelled and God and cried. I just was going to sign on and say "It hurts", but...."It sucks, it hurts, I am angry, It feels unreal, I want Rod back, IT JUST SUCKS,UCKS,SUCKS,SUCKS. If I weren't so sensible even right now I'd just drink up the medicine I haven't dumped down the toilet. (I want to see if the oncology clinic can use it somehow but keep forgetting to call them. Don't worry) I have his picture on my computer from about 1989. I was thinking about when I would cut his hair and how long it would get in between. How I hadn't seen him without a beard for 31 years and he looked pretty good without it when his dark hair fell out and the lighter ones stayed, but I shaved him a couple times. That really hurt, to have him so ill he couldn't do it himself. He loved living in the country, he loved to fiddle in the barn at his workshop area, mow, tend his tomato plants. He'd cut wood for the winter but only when it got cold out! He took care of me and I can't take care of me now. And when I cry I scare the dog. I don't want to live without him, why does God take the nice people and leave the scum bags? Barb Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missyk Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 *Taps Pat on the shoulder* Uh... I'm in need of a mommy for advice on this "boy thing" that I've never done before...I have an extra room since the "boy thing" still is sleeping in his crib in OUR room , it would be WONDERFUL to have someone to talk to during the day who doesn't drool on me, AND I live just to the west! LOL Sending warm hugs ('cause it's cold, icy and snowy down here, too!) and lots of love!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barbb Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 OK, reading my last line, not any of you guys are scum bags I mean the scum bags of the world. Sorry B Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wendyr Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 (((((Patkid))))) tomorrow will be a better day wendyr Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sharyn Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 OKAY Listen Up... I AM TAKING PAT...... No arguments.... Seriously, Pat, I wish I could meet you for a cup of coffee and a hug - You have always seemed like famly to me. Much Love, Sharon xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kamataca Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 That's it. We need to open the Pub and have a Pat auction. I'd offer up my speedy, annoying voice as auctioneer, but as I plan on bidding as well, I would just fix the thing in my favor. Drinks for the rest of you all around as you drown your sorrows in missing out on the opportunity. Hurrah for Pat, for taking something we all feel at times and bringing us together over it. I lve you Pat, and I love you all. Thanks for giving me a place to come to tonight when I was down. Kelly Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Welthy Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 (((Pat))) (((Barb))) It sucks -- BIG TIME. I'd offer you one of my two vacant bedrooms Pat. Not too sure if my leaky toilet, icy porch & deck, overweight body combined with overwrought mind, moaning old cat, step-daughter who has "poof" vanished from my life, son that still lives at home , or lack of cooking skills would be any more appealing though. I do have a condo in Florida that we can run away to and we could share "fat" clothes! (Hanging around me would make you feel soooo much better about your own weight, trust me.) We could pretend to be Pod People! (I keep trying to sell my extended family on the idea of a family compound where we all could live together.) Hang in there -- that's about all I can say. I wish someone could tell us what we're supposed to be doing with our lives now. I hate this "new normal" with a passion and I'm understanding you very loud and clear -- and I'm a newbie at this! Many hugs, Debi Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teriw Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 (((Pat))) We don't have snow in Los Angeles -- wanna come here? Thinking of you... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patkid Posted December 9, 2007 Author Share Posted December 9, 2007 (((((Barb))))) I am so sorry we have to feel this way. Your pain is so fresh and my heart aches for you. Please know that I care, I understand and I am here. Love Pat Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MomsGirl Posted December 9, 2007 Share Posted December 9, 2007 Hi Pat, Okay, we were meant for each other. We are just finishing our basement and it will have a big bedroom and full bath for you...my three kids need a nana desperately, and it sounds like you would really fit the bill...my house is a mess and I would welcome someone to help me clean it! ...we love dogs but I am too busy with kids to get one right now....and I have two wonderful sisters, thus giving you THREE loving daughters...although we all might be a little old to be your daughters, but that's just a number, right? How 'bout it? All kidding aside, I'm sorry you are feeling this way. I haven't posted in a while but your post inspired to me to write. I can't imagine the grief you are feeling missing your husband. Sending you hugs and happy thoughts... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.