Hi Kathy, and welcome. How wonderful to see you post. All of the doubts and insecurities you expressed are, I think, common to all of us when we finish treatment.
I never had surgery, so I can't comment on those side effects, but I can say that hair grows back (mine did!), you'll get stronger and stronger every day, and you'll begin to feel ready to take back your life again.
Be kind to yourself, you deserve it.
Trish
By the way, we all adore your son -- you've done a great job with him.