stand4hope

Dear Lori, So much of what you have described here and in your prevous posts takes me down memory lane with my dad. These facilities are just too short-staffed - they just can't find enough nurses to do the job. Lots of love and hugs, Peggy

Connie, I read this at work today and couldn't reply. I was having an emotional day to begin with, and your message about Fay's broken heart just about completely shattered mine. Like Bunny said, "This was painful to read." Love and prayers to Fay A., Peggy

THANK YOU, KATIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I sent you a PM. Love, Peggy

Has anyone heard from Teri (TAnn)? She last posted on Tuesday that she was in the hospital, in a lot of pain and starting radiation, but hasn't posted since. She said her mom brought her a laptop, and I sent her a PM, but she hasn't opened it. If anyone has her telephone number, could you please check on her and let us know how she's doing. Also, please ask her or her husband if you can PM me with her telephone number. Thank you. I'm worried about her. Love to all, Peggy

Dear Cindy, A GREAT BIG CONGRATULATIONS TO YOU!!! 5 years - that AWESOME! Keep it up! Love, Peggy

Hello, Michele, I'm sorry to be late with a response to your post. I'm so sorry to hear that your dad is gone. I understand what you're going through. I lost my dad and my husband both within about a year of each other, and so, I thank you for your expressions of sympathy, too. God bless you, Peggy

Oh, Pam, I am so sorry to hear this. I understand the never-ending tears. I just hate hearing that Joel was in such horrible pain. I hear this so much from others, and I just don't understand it. Maybe it's because doctors/institutions are afraid of the potential repercussions if they over-medicate. Who knows? Anyway, it just makes me very sad when I hear this. Pam, as you know, there are a lot of us here who have been on this same journey, and I hope you will call on us if you need help getting through this tough time. Hang in there, sweetie, and my prayers are with you! Love, Peggy

Dear Mike, Thank you so much for posting for your mom. I have a note for her below, but this one is for you. I pray that God gives you and the rest of your family strength in the days ahead. Like others here, I have been through what you are going through several times, and I know how painful it is. Please try to have as much fun with your mom right now as you can. Think of fun things to do or say. We did that with my mom and dad and we have the most pleasant and fun memories of their last days. Your mom has a lot of justified anger about her home, so it would be wonderful if you could get her to put that behind her and get her to laugh and enjoy this time with her family. All my love, Peggy Dear Fay, What can I say? I'm just feeling sad from head to toe. We've had some very interesting conversations the past couple of years - sometimes we agreed and sometimes we didn't, but my love and concern for you are right in there with everyone else. You are a rock, have been a rock, and will CONTINUE to be a rock, whether on this earth or in heaven. God blessed you with brains, charm, wit and compassion, but mostly I think He blessed you with profound determination and persistence. Like others have said, I've never known someone to work so hard at surviving as you have. Your determination to live, thrive and enjoy yourself, in spite of your circumstances, is indescribable to others unless they have known you like we know you here. I pray with all my heart that you will receive a miracle, and if God says no to that request, then I pray that your final days will be peaceful and filled with laughs and love from your family and friends. May God bless you over and over and over again! Love, Peggy

Debbie (dchurchi) stole every word I would have said. I, too, hate any kind of shopping, the parking lots, the lines, the people that block the aisles, the prices, and I especially hate malls. But, online shopping is T-E-R-R-I-F-I-C!! Peggy

ATSSUH MUH GIRL!!!!! FYI: My son calls my big girl panties "granny panties" . . . As Don would say, "SMART A@*" Becky, I think you're too ornery for cancer - it can't take it. Congrats, girlfriend! Love you! Peggy

I ditto Larry . . . but I would also make use of that "edit" button, and I also now focus on the future. So, pretty much all of the above. That's cheating, huh? Love, Peggy

I will definitely be praying for Fay tonight, too! Love, Peggy

Oh, Teri, I am so upset. I was off to bed and decided to log in one more time before turning in. I didn't expect to see this at all. I will be praying for you before I go to bed tonight. You have my love and my hugs and my heart. Take care of yourself, and, remember, I will be praying and praying and praying. Also, I agree with Ry, do you have somebody that can post for you? I don't know what else to say, but I don't want to stop talking to you, either. I'm just so upset for you . . . . . I just know it's going to be ok. I just know the radiation is going to work and you will get chemo and everything is going to be ok. It is, it is, it is!!!!!!!! OH, DEAR GOD, PLEASE TAKE GOOD CARE OF OUR TANN. I'm sending you more love than I can ever express in words . . . . . . . . Love, Peggy

Great news, Trish. Really great news! Love, Peggy

Defintely doughnut - I should have been a cop! Make-up on weekends or Plain Face? Peggy

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYY!!! I love it! I love it! I love it! AND . . . . . . . I love you, too, Kasey! WAY TO GO!! Peggy

Thank you all for your kind words. I got through the day - spent most of it online spending money. I did almost no work and made it my first official "Peggy day" since Don's been gone. It felt good. Whenever I would tell Don I didn't feel like doing such and such and would rather take a nap, he ALWAYS said, "Then, take a nap!" Well, I didn't take a nap, but I didn't do any of the stuff I "should" have done, and I liked it. Thanks again for the loving support - I need it. Love to all, Peggy

The good thing - I like to talk. The bad thing - I like to talk. Thanks, Don, and love and hugs to everyone. Peggy

I have two things I do: 1. Work in my house. 2. Lay on the couch watching TV with a bowl of popcorn and one of my dogs curled up behind my legs. Soooooooo relaxing. . . I usually fall asleep and wake up in the same spot in the morning. Peggy

Uh, no, thank God! Have you ever sent a letter or email that you regretted sending?

Thank you, Carleen! Prayers here, too, Karen. I hope somebody will post for her and let us know how she's doing. Hugs to you, Karen. Love, Peggy

Oh, Sue, I just hate it that Mike is suffering so much, and you, too! . . . . . .STILL HUGGING! Love, Peggy

Sue, Like I said in my PM, I'm stilling hugging and won't let go. Love, Peggy

Hello, Holly, Ginny (as well as others) has always given the best advice - keep busy. Have lots and lots of projects on your plate. As far as your dad is concerned, I can only use myself as an example. I can't think of anything that anyone can do to help me except be there when I want to talk and/or cry, listen to me and hug me, all without preaching and/or a lot of advice. I don't much like it when people tell me Don is in a better place, that he's with the Lord, or that he is now without pain or suffering. I already know that, and it gives me a lot of comfort, but it doesn't help my personal pain. My personal grieving is selfish - it's all about me. Regardless, whether some think Don didn't lose to cancer, I did lose, and I lost big time, and it hurts. So, one way you can help your dad is to figure out a way to make him comfortable to grieve with you (or to you). Ask him how he's doing - how he's really doing, and then let him talk - and talk - and talk - and cry, and talk and talk and cry some more. Cry with him, hold him, and most important - let him know that it's ok for him to share those feelings with you, but only if you mean it. In my case, my son would not be able to handle it. He can't be the one to hear about or see my grief because it only makes it worse for him. If you can handle it, and really want to help him, then give it a try. If not, then don't try because it will make things worse for you, personally. If you can't do it, see if you can find someone your dad can do this with, and would be willing to do it, be it a counselor, family person, close friend, or pastor. The only other thing I can think of that you could do to help him would be to see if you can facilitate finding things for him to do, especially worthwhile and fulfilling-type things. Maybe some volunteer work, asking if he can help you paint your house, or take care of the kids, or see if you can get him to do some things to fix up his house or car. You know your dad better than anyone else, so you can do a better job thinking of things that might interest him. Sorry this is so long, Holly, and I hope that maybe there might be at least one little thing here that will help you and/or your dad. Grieving isn't easy, no matter what we do, but I do think there are things that can help, especially asking God for guidance. Much love, Peggy

This is so sad. Brenda, I know you are feeling crushed in so many ways and for so many reasons. I understand, and I care, and I'm so sorry. I pray God holds you tightly and gives you comfort. Love, Peggy