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Just had scans


TracyD

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I just got back from having my first set of scans since I started carbo/taxol/Avastin, two cycles. I've got to put it aside until next friday when I get the results and find out if I'm continuing on this course or moving on to something else. My doc. tells me we're just scratching the surface on treatment options so I'm trying to keep that in perspective as we wait for results.

The other night my 11 year old, Samantha, wanted to know what happens next if this doesn't work, I told her we just try something else, and there's a lot of things left to try. She then wanted to know what happens if they don't work. I didn't know what to say other than we're not going to worry about that now. Is it possible that she really doesn't understand, or does she just not want to?

This is really the pits.

Tracy

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Tracy,

I'm sending prayers your way. I'm sorry you have to wait a week to get your results. I know how hard this is and we didn't have young children to explain things to, but IMO you gave your daughter the perfect answer. There is no other answer except that you aren't going to worry about what hasn't happened. My heart goes out to you and your family. Will be looking for those results next week.

Love and Prayers ,

Sue

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No,

I think she understands TOO well and it's hard not to focus on the scary stuff, the "what ifs" and the possibilities that these treatments may not work.....

It's really scary for kids. It's hard enough just having self confidence and being positive for any kid in a "normal" atmosphere...throw in something emotional or life threatening to those they love...and it can be terrifying.

There are survivors that I know who have had 5+ years of remission, and their children (teens now) still won't leave their side for very long because that fear of losing them was so great.

I just think your daughter loves you so much, is really scared for you, and needs the constant reassurance that there ARE options for you and that this is something you CAN beat. You answered her perfectly.

I'm sorry you have to wait a week for those results. Am praying for the best.

My prayers to you and your family,

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Someone mentioned that Katie should start selling a button that says "SCAN TIME SUCKS" and I am sure you are relating with that right now. It is the pits and Drs. don't seem to acknowledge this agony at all. Talk about stress! I think there should be a study around people's immune systems and how they are affected by waiting for test results when they are facing a serous illness.

We understand and hope for nothing but the best for you Tracy. Try to stay calm, although I always found that the hardest part.

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Tracy-

I hope the scans go well -- it's great your doctor is positive and has lots of options for you. About your daughter-- I don't think they do get it. I think when a kid sees a parent in bed sick as a dog they understand you're sick. But- with lung cancer they see you up and around (yes tired and down here and there) and in their mind you're ok. At least with my older daughter (she's 15) that seems to be the case. I truly don't think she comprehends the seriousness of the whole situation.

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Tracy; waiting for scan results has always been hard for me. I had the radiology department cc a copy to my primary provider. I could usually get a copy on the second or third day and look it over before my appointment with my oncologist so I could prepare myself for any questions I might have. The RN nurse at the oncologist's office did not want me to see the report before I saw the oncologist, so I circumvented her.

It sounds like to me that Samantha is definitely thinking about your cancer. I agree that you gave her the right answer.

Don M

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Hey Tracy,

I was thinking about all day today. Believe it or not, I was at Johns Hopkins today with a friend who was getting a second opinion on breast cancer. There was a lot of 'wait' time so I was sending many good vibes your way.

We will talk about Sam, poor thing. I have my thoughts on that one. Hope your 'hair' arrived and you can now make a decision as to what you want to do. Planning to catch up soon while we await the great scan results!

Love,

Aunt Kasey

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My doctor told me to call the next day after the scan to get results.

As for your daughter--I'm impressed she even verbalized her feelings. My son never asked anything.

I did hook him up with the guidance counselors right away. He was beginning 6th grade with one cancer and in 9th with the other. Both guidance counselors were very good about seeing him on a revolving basis.

We also emphasize one day at a time. I even use that in my classroom. When kids are stressing on tonight, tomorrow, next week, I remind them that the only thing we have is right now, this moment.

FYI--my therapy after the lung cancer helped me tremendously to deal with these daily issues.

gail

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I'm not sure I should have answered this question from a patients perspective. :oops:

My experience is with my own son, who was by my side as his grandpa battled lung cancer, and also from hearing other survivors's experiences with their children.

My son was 5 when grandpa was dx. 4 years ago, and even then he asked everyday "what if". Even if there was very positive news and explainations of new treatment, he always worried adn cried at night about "what if.."

To this day he gets very upset at the word cancer, and if he hears someone is in remission...he always says, "what if.." and "I know it can..." "and this or that can still happen"..and he gets very emotional and sad. He even projects the possibility that cancer might happen to grandma or mommy and daddy or even to him.

So my guy really "got it" in a big way... these days I'm just trying hard to get him to just be a kid...

My prayers go out to you and your family. Sorry, if I was off base.

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Thanks everyone.

Katie, you were not off base and your thoughts and insight are much appreciated :D .

Last week I finally contacted a counseling agency. Unfortunately, most of the therapists were out enjoying the last days of summer so I was told someone would be getting back to me within a couple weeks. The only reason I'm waiting on them is that the agency came highly recommended. I really want someone to talk with the kids and find out if they're "OK", and I want talk to someone about what we should be doing to help them.

Again, thanks everyone. I don't know how I'd get through this without all of you.

Tracy

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Wow Tracy, you sure have alot on your plate. I'll pray for good scan results, I can only imagine as a survivor how tense the wait can be.

Therapy is a great idea for the kids. Adolescents have so many hormones and issues going on, throw a disease that threatens their mother into the mix and it must be overwhelming. Your response was just fine.

If you find yourself in a conversation of "what-ifs" again, try answering her question with a question: "Sam, are you afraid the treatments won't work?" or something along those lines. It will open up communication where she can express her fears.

What a beautiful family you have. I wish you the best and will keep good scans for you in my prayers.

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Tracy,

I have an 11 yr old daughter too and she does understand, there are times when she doesn't want to discuss it and that's ok. It is very difficult to give answers when you don't have any answers. I tell my daughter when we talk about her dad that we just take it one step at a time, and dad is doing everything that he can do and his doctors are helping him in every way that they can. I'm so sorry you have to go thru this and to have young children, it can be so difficult. I found that my girls have grown up considerably because of this.

My husband just had his scans today, so I'm on edge as well, I used to not mind scan time, now it scares the you know what out of me...all I can do is just hope and pray for the best. I will do that for you too....

Grace

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Hi Tracy,

I know how hard this wait is. Try not to count the days, and before you know it you'll be there getting the results.

I just want you to know that I'll be praying and wishing everything is working the way we want it to. I have a real good feeling.

I just love your doctor. That's the way I always look at it. Plus, the new stuff that's being discovered every day.

Joan

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Tracy,

I'll be thinking about you as you wait and praying for good results for you. This whole disease is hard on the kids, my daughter is only a year older than yours and she asks a million questions constantly. What's next? What if it doesn't work? Will you be alive for my high school graduation? How many years do you think you can live?

They are just frightened, they feel their world is changing so therapy is probably a good thing to help them with the changes.

My six year old asked me yesterday (and he doesn't really know what's wrong with me) if I will be here when the baby is 6 years old. I didn't know what to say except " the doctors are trying to make mommy better".

I'm sending you a big hug (((((Tracy))))

Lilly

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Tracy I fully understand what you are going through. Scan time is so frightening, I absolutely dread it. This whole thing is so tough on kids, mine don't say a lot but I am sure they think a lot. You said the right thing because it's the truth.

Sending many positive thoughts your way and am thinking of you.

Sharon

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