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TBone has died.


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No words can adequately express my sadness. I keep thinking of the children--the children of all of you-. My only comfort is knowing that you will gather around them and offer them the love and support that you know they will need. Terry is counting on that.

I am a better person for having known you all.



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To Terry's family:

May the inner peace God is granting you now, help you through the days ahead. You have a strong, supportive family and you will all need each other now. I couldn't believe it when I read about Tbone. I still visit sometimes to see how my friends are doing. I, like others, pray and hope for miracles every day for this terrible disease.

In memory of Tbone (my favorite Irish blessing):

May the road rise to meet you

May the wind be always at your back

May the sun shine warm upon your face

May the rains fall soft upon your fields

And until we meet again

May God hold you in the palm of His Hand

Your family will be reunited again someday -- Tbone's just making sure things will be in order. God Bless your family during this difficult time.

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This is heartbreaking news! I am so saddened to hear of TBone's passing. I have been thinking of your sister's post about TBone being ready to embark on this wonderful fishing trip. My heart is just broken for you and all of TBone's family!

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Just realized T-Bones service is going on now. Here's his song:

Fish and Whistle, John Prine

I been thinking lately about the people i meet

The carwash on the corner and the hole in the street

The way my ankles hurt with shoes on my feet

And i'm wondering if i'm gonna see tomorrow.

Father forgive us for what we must do

You forgive us we'll forgive you

We'll forgive each other till we both turn blue

Then we'll whistle and go fishing in heaven.

I was in the army but i never dug a trench

I used to bust my knuckles on a monkey wrench

Then i'd go to town and drink and give the girls a pinch

But i don't think they ever even noticed me.

Fish and whistle, whistle and fish

Eat everything that they put on your dish

And when we get through we'll make a big wish

That we never have to do this again again? again????

On my very first job i said thank you and please

They made me scrub a parking lot down on my knees

Then i got fired for being scared of bees

And they only give me fifty cents an hour.

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Thank you all for your kind words and the continued support through these past seven months. You've all become extensions of our family and we love you for it.

Terry's service was very fitting for him and the rest of the family then all the family (including aunts, uncles and cousins) along with the "Terry Bearers" (as he called them on his list), life-long friends and old navy buddies all ate supper together outside by the pond. It was good, it was sad, it was right.

Thank you all so much.

And don't think we're going anywhere, 'cause we're kind of like beggar lice, hard to get shake us off once we've become attached.

Fran (TBone's sister)

P.S. And for those that don't know what beggar lice is/are, it is a weed with a fuzzy little pod about the side of an eye pupil. They get on your clothes when you are walking in the woods and are hard to get off. Also can be a real nuisance.

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I am so glad to hear that you guys aren't going anywhere - I have just grown to love every one of you. We will all miss Terry but I know, for me, it will help to still be able to talk to you guys. I am praying for comfort for all of you - God bless you all.

Love and hugs,

Nancy B

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Please forgive me for not having responded sooner. I honestly saw the post on Saturday, but couldn't find the words.

I hope that you all stay on here, I am glad that you have stated that you will. T-Bone will be sorely missed here-as you can see by all of the responses. How lucky you all are to have one another, and how lucky you all were to have T, and he, you. I am honored to have had the opportunity to "know" T, and to have gotten to know his extrodinary family.

Whenever I see fish, or steak, I think of T-Bone, knowing-now-where the nickname came from. And I chuckle to myself.

My wish for you all is that your memories comfort you. I, personally, believe that our loved ones continue to share with us when we laugh, and cry, and that the love that is felt for them by those of us 'left behind' is still felt. We may not notice it, but if you really consentrate-you can feel it...so when you feel you need a hug from T-Bone, just stop, be still, remember-close your eyes-he'll be there.


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Dear, Dear Friends,

I sat down at the computer early this morning just to check on everyone, promising myself that I would not stay long, as not only do I have many chores to 'catch up' on, but I also did not think my emotional state could handle a long browse of the message board. But here it is 2 hours later and I am still here.

You cannot imagine how important your condolences have been to me in handling my grief. I have read them over and over and each time I cry and each time I smile.

At the time of TBone's 'visitation', there had been 66 replies to my post notifying all of you of his death. I printed out the posts (I hope you don't mind) and made a notebook entitled "Condolences from lchelp.com - the lung cancer survivors' message board Terry joined in January, 2004". I put the notebook on the table in the funeral chapel entryway along with pictures of him from over his lifetime. Many people were astounded that so many people from so many places had responded with such beautiful words. Many commented that it was evident that not only did TBone have a strong and supportive and loving family here at home and in our community, but he also had one that he had never met face to face. Thank you so much for all the words, all the tears, and all the love. I gave the notebook to Ann, Dozier, Elliott and Anna and I know they will find comfort in it in the days and years to come.

As Teacake said, we think TBone would have liked his funeral service and our 'party' afterwards. We burned a CD with Dido's "White Flag" and "Thank you", Jackson Browne's "For a Dancer", John Prine's "Fish and Whistle" and Bob Dylan's "Forever Young" which played as the crowd (and what a crowd it was!!) assembled at the graveside. During the short service, Jake, our nephew, played and sang John Prine's "Paradise" and Dylan's "Forever Young" (dedicated by Terry to his children and nieces and nephews). The crowd dispersed to "Fish and Whistle". Then we came to my house where our many, many wonderful friends fed our out-of -town guests, extended families, friends (and whoever else showed up) from a stash of food brought in by friends that would have fed the entire Message Board! The kids swam in the pond and we all relived old times and we all left smiling. Terry, who was actually not a big crowd man (he liked to talk bull one-on-one or in small groups), I am sure was looking down and smiling - that is, if he wasn't too busy hauling in fish on that big boat he bought last week!

I grieve with those of you who have lost loved ones this week and also those of you who are sharing the last days with your loved ones. That is the hardest part.

I thank each one of you for taking the minutes from your precious time to express your condolences and to share our grief. And I once again thank all of you for taking TBone and his family into your own family and into your hearts for the past 7 months. Rest assured that every one of you will always be a part of our family and each one of you will always have a place in my heart and possess a piece of my soul.


Ginger (ViVi)

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Thank you so much ViVi for sharing this with us. I know how hard it is to come here but I also know how much the love here can comfort.

There are many special people here. In fact everyone here are my heros because I know how very hard the road they travel is. Once in a while someone comes along whose light shines just a little brighter for some reason. Why that happens we don't know nor do we understand. Tbone was a person whose light shown very bright and he earned the love of everyone here. He is very sadly missed here as he is in your family and comunity. It hurts to know that he will not post here again and it hurts to know the deep deep sorrow that his family is feeling. I would not have missed knowing him because like everyone else here his light gave me a very special gift. He will never be forgotten.

I know that he is hauling in one fish after another and enjoying every minute of it. It is we left here behind who will have to come to terms with losing him. It is our loss but his reward for a life well spent because of the love that he radiated. Because of that bright light that he passed on to everyone. Bless you and your family and know that you are in my thoughts and prayers. Lillian

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I haven't been on for a while so missed this sad news. So sorry for all of you.

When I was reading about the moon, I looked back at the dates of the post. I saw that same moon here in Florida. I remember going out for some reason Friday evening and seeing it as it started to rise, and I went in and made my son come out and look at it. I knew there was something special about it -- went back and checked on it a couple more times during the night as it rose (even once when I woke up in the middle of the night) and it was really beautiful.

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Please accept my deepest sympathy for the loss of your father, husband, brother, and friend...I have been able to respond being at a loss for words. Seeing ViVi sign off using Terry's words finally allowed me to release my sorrow for you all. You lost a great man, and I am secure knowing he is now with the Lord and watching over you and "praying for us all". God bless and keep Terry forever in His care.


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