After Effects

[daggiesmom]

I think this topic belongs under LC Suvivors issues so here goes-

After the medical problems I've had lately, I find myself feeling very down. I'm home during the day and seem to be reliving my "coma" experiences which were extremely strange dreams. I tried writing my thoughts out, talking somewhat about it to friends but really don't want to talk too much - I feel I put too many people thru too much. I'm teary even as I type this. Then after awhile I'll be ok. Do you think it's normal to feel depressed? Shouldn't I feel happy I survived? The Dr. gave me Prozac when I was released but honestly it really upset my stomach and made me feel even more depressed. I stopped taking it (only took a few pills). I have Xanax which I can take and do, but the Dr. said that is not meant for long term therapy and can be addictive. That's why he gave me the Prozac.

Does anyone here have a similar reaction to "Surviving" and were you put on medication? Do you think it's like Post Tramatic Stress and will pass on it's own?

Joanie

[hollyanne]

Joanie -

Wish I could tell you something about post traumatic stress - I can't. But, I do have a lot of experience with anti-depressants -- you have to give them a chance to help you out. Biochemical changes take a minimum of 7-10 days with most of the medications. I just went back on Prozac myself....Maybe you could try another one? At least then you would be physically able to deal with whatever is going on...

Lots of love and well wishes,

Holly

[Donna G]

There are other meds besides prozac. Check with your doctor and see if he'll give you something else. I took Wellbutrin. I think that and someone to talk to is so important. This is a very stressful disease and most of us need help. Best wishes, Donna G

[Patkid]

I just care.............and I want you to know that.

Love

Pat

[chloesmom]

Joanie,

I think that depression goes hand in hand with serious illnesses and long hospitalizations. It's common practice now to put heart bypass patients on anti-depressants once they get home and back to their lives. I don't know if they know why, but it's commonplace for cardiac bypass patients to display symptoms of depression.

I know that, in my case, counseling, medication, and some time to get back to 'normal' got me through during diagnosis, treatment, and trying to get my bearings again. I never looked at it as a long term thing, just for as long as I needed it. Turned out to be about a year, and then I weaned off all the medications successfully.

I would go back in a minute and do the same thing all over again rather than subject myself to that kind of despair again.

Just my thoughts. I don't want you to think that you're the only one that's ever been affected this way.....lots of us have.

I hope things turn around for you soon.

Cindy

[Don M]

Joanie: You might try lexapro. I was on it for a year and it helped me. Keep writing.

DoN m

[Connie B]

Well my dear from One Survivor to Another, when it rains it pours. And you and I both had had more then our share of RAIN!!

About 5 years ago I was on Celexa for depression after I lost my son. It worked very well for me.

Talk Talk Talk Talk and Talk some more is always the best medicine.

I know for me, being a lung cancer survivor and now having to have had open heart surgery 3 times in the last three years, can do a number on your attitude and your way of thinking. I have learned in my case, that things will be what they will be. If I live then I live, if I die then I die. No I don't want to die, but I am at peace with that issue after all I have been through. And having to go through major surgery is never fun, but the good news is, I made it again, and I guess I'm meant to be here. So on that note I take the time to stop and smell the roses. It's Another Great Day To Be Alive!

Talk to your doc my dear and get your med's changed. I also went to counseling and yes, it helped.

[stand4hope]

Joanie,

I'm sure it is some kind of trauma effect. I've heard lots of good things about Lexapro for depression. My son took it for several months and it helped him a lot.

Hang in there - the sun is always shining even when you can't see it. You will see it again.

Love,

Peggy

[Ry]

Joanie-- What you've gone through was horrible and I think it is a type of post traumatic stress disorder. It is normal and I went through the very same thing years ago. I was extremely ill and came very close to dying from endocarditis because they couldn't make a diagnosis. Once they did, I had to spend months in the hospital recovering (this was before they sent you home with picc lines.) When I got out everyone acted like I should be fine, but I wasn't fine. I wasn't myself for a very long time.

It's normal Joanie and it will pass eventually but drugs might help. Just keep talking it out--it helps. We're all here to listen.

[Bob-ellen]

Joanie,

There is the chance that you may need to find the "right" med for depression. Depression is often a normal outcome when we have faced a traumatic experience. Lung cancer is no small potatoes - physically or emotionally.

I have shed many tears over the past months, but have been able to bounce back. However, there were many times in my life when a heavy experience stayed with me for a very long time.

Perhaps, your doctor and you can find the med that will help you. Sometimes, it takes a while to get the right "mix."

Barbara

[midge]

Joanie,

I agree that what you do have is a common reaction to your situation and if you believe in counseling, do it. I think that to think that you come through something like you just did untouched and feeling like a new women is nuts. You have every right to feel the feelings you are and I would go with the flow.

Mental health drugs may help, but I think that being depressed is normal under the situation. If depression continues, I sure would seek out a med to help you through it.

I personally tried to take a mental health med, made me more depressed and got off it..to each his own. I think if you aren't depressed at times with lung cancer somethings wrong with you. If depression remains a constant, do something about it.

Midge

[kimmek]

Joanie...I didnt read thru all the other posts really as i am in a hurry, but wanted to take a moment to respond to you. So forgive me if I am repeating.

There are so many many more meds to take for depression than Prozac. I took it once many years ago and knew within a few days i knew this was not the med for me. I went on to take Paxil for many more years. For some reason that suddenly stopped working for me and today I am on Welbutrin. Ask your doc to give you something else. There is nothing wrong with feeling the need for a anti-depressant. My mom was so against taking it at first, and really today doesnt want to take it. But since I am in charge of her meds, she gets it. Her onc said to me once when talking about depression and if Mom "really" needed it. Her response was How could anyone going thru this NOT be depressed? Lung cancer or any serious illness changes your life in so many ways. Its inevitable not to be worried. I take the Wellbutrin because I know that if I dont there is no way I could get thru eveyday and take care of my mom with a smiling face. They help in so many ways.

One other thing that has been told to me by Moms onc and pulmo docs is that xanax is addicting yes, but sometimes the benefit of it far outways that. Its just another pill that Mom will be on forever, like her insulin, heart meds etc...The problem starts if you take them for a long time then the doctor suddenely decides you are better and dont need them.(And yes you will be better). If he sees xanax as a short term med then he is not going to prescribe them to you forever. Xanax has helped my mom so much. At first she just threw a fit about taking them, but now she takes them all by herself, she knows when she needs them. They prevent her from panicking which in turn makes her SOB and then it becomes a vicious cycle which before she would always end up in the er from mainly panic. Taking xanax controls that. Respitory panic is very real for alot of lung cancer patients as well as those with copd. Unfortunatly not all doctors are comfortable with its long term uses. There is a huge difference in addicted and dependant. It was explained to me that unless mom started buying them off the streets then she was just dependant on them.

I hope you find the right meds for you and they quickly get you out of your "funk". I also think everything you are feeling is pretty normal, to me anyway.

God Bless

Kim

[trish2418]

((((((((Joanie))))))))

Wish I had the magic words or the magic bullet that would make everything okay for you. I'll pray that you're able to find the something that will work for you.

Trish

[Kaffie]

I tried Prozac and it knocked me on my tush.

I was in a Cancer support group and one thing I did notice was the medication prescribed for sick, frail or older people was Zoloft. Apparently it was the most tolerated by these people.

Kathy

[Maryanne]

Thinking or you Joanie, and hope you are feeling better.

(((JOANIE))))

Maryanne

[francesbean]

Loving thoughts for Joanie.

[Donna]

My Dear Joanie,

I am so sorry you are not feeling like your normal self..I wish I had the magic cure for you but since I don't, please know I care a great deal about you and you are always in my prayers..I know Mark is also cheering for you..

God Bless..

Donna

[Carleen]

Joanie,

I agree with what others have said about getting the right medication for you. It is normal to feel sort of shell shocked after all you've been through. Although you have made it, you have made it by coming through a lot of crap and a lot of fear. Those things leave their mark. You will get better, and those scars will heal but it takes time. I've been on Lexapro for about 2 1/2 years, and it has been great. At first I didn't think they were doing much because I didn't feel a noticiable difference. But I guess like hollyanne was right in that after a week or two, I just felt stronger.

Also, people talk to someone. You said you didn't really want to talk to too much to your family and friends because:

I feel I put too many people thru too much

But let me tell you from someone who is a caregiver, and someone who loves someone going through LC. You should not feel guilt for putting anyone through this. You did not chose to put them through anything, they chose to help you through it and love you through it. And I am sure they still love you and want to be there for you for whatever you need. I know that there are times I would feel better if Keith wanted to talk about things, because I am afraid to bring them up because if he is feeling positive I don't want to bring him down or make him worry, but there are feelings I have too that I would share. It's produced trauma for us caregivers as well, and if we both go about gently assuming we need to keep quiet for the needs of the other, then no one is getting the help they need. Give them a chance. Also, remember you have us here, and we will listen and love for as much as you need to get out in the open.

Take care sweet Joanie, and I pray the clouds lift soon and your heart is filled with warmth and sunshine.

[cindi o'h]

Joanie..

I care. You have gotten lots of good advice so far. I hate following all these..especially Carleen.. she says things always in the nicest of ways~!

Anyway, dear.

I am on Lexapro and there is no way I will give it up no matter how good I am feeling. No reason to get into the pitz if I don't have to. No side effects except a very short-lived tummy ache every once-in-awhile.

I tried other anti-depressents, but for me, this one has been the best. Not only anti-depressent, but also has anti-anxiety properties to it.

Like Ry, I went through a serious illness and I did get PTSD from it... that became as bad as the life threatening illness itself.

I was treated by a PsyD. with a technique that worked for me for me by reprogramming my brain and thoughts that I had regarding my illness. The name of the therapy is EMDR....emotive, memory, and I forget what the D and R are... It was a freeing experience. For instance, in my mind, I was saying and believing "I am dying"...

That was replaced with, "I am alive and well".

Etc. But, that sentence, I am dying, was stuck in my brain..and the brain needed to be reprogrammed through a sophisticated therapist and sound and light equipment.

This is HUGE Joanie. Don't be alone in this ...we are here for you. Please no shame.. NONE get rid of that.

Pm any old time.

Cindi o'h

[blaze100]

Hi Joanie, You are not alone. I started getting down again when I hit 5 years. Like you, the same creepy nightmares from past. As others said, probably post t.s.? Love and Mercy, Barb

[Bill]

Joanie :

IMO some degree of patient ( and caregiver ) depression is to be expected given the circumstances. Do you take any narcotic analgesics ? These drugs can cause depression. If you do, the litmus test is to see if the depression is lessened or resolved shortly after taking a scheduled dose of pain med and if the depression returns as time passes ( and the plasma-drug level drops ). If the depression is mild a minor tranquilizer like Xanax can be used with intermittent dosing to lessen or resolve the depression ( and anxiety ). Caution : Xanax will " boost " the effect of any narcotic analgesic that you may be taking. IMO unless the depression is clearly severe avoid the major tranquilizers and related anti-psychotic drugs. These drugs have a slow onset of action ( sometimes several weeks ~ oftentimes patient feels worse ), most work successfully only ~ 30% of the time, they are loaded with adverse side effects and drug interactions and are hard on the liver ( already overloaded with cancer-related drugs ).

Good luck.

[MalouDP]

Joanne:

Like Don and others here, my husband has been on Lexapro for a year now. Even on his bad days, he still wears a smile. I think this is a good drug for depression really. I know I need to start taking it for myself. I'm feeling sad, and down most of the time. God Bless.

Malou

[Patty]

Hi Joanie,

I've had a lot of experience with depression and anti-depressants, even before this cancer. Anyways, I will vouch for Lexapro also. It has been the only one that I really noticed a difference with, and pretty much right away, too. Probably, you also need to heal up from your last ordeal and not expect a lot out of yourself. Take Care, Patty

[daggiesmom]

Thank you all so much for your responses. I have made an appointment to see my dr. to resolve this issue.In the past he had given me Lexapro which also didn't work for me. So when I go to him maybe there is something else for me. I won't know if I don't go. Also, I'm on alot of medicines and have new symptoms such as pain in the surgery area (I think the nerves are "waking up") nausea, no interest in eating or cooking (very odd for me!) no desire to do anything. I have it all written down, ready for the appointment. He is a good doctor, so hopefully it'll work out. Thanks everyone, you're all great!

Joanie ((()))

[ginnyde]

Smart Joanie, they is no reason in today's world of wonder drugs to suffer like this. Also smart to write it all down since we so often forget stuff when we get in the office.