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Mom of 3 (diagnosed last week)


ursol

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I'm an ex smoker, mother of 3, 40 years old and diagnosed with lung cancer last week after needle biopsy on 2 cm lesion on lower right lung.

Going to Yale-New Haven friday to discuss lymph nodes in mid chest that also lit up on PET and potentially biopsing them during surgery. I still cannot believe this has happened and that I may not see my 6 month old even reach her 1st birthday. I can no longer sleep and am so depressed.

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(((((((((( ursol)))))))))) Wrong, wrong, and more wrong!!! This is NOT a death sentence. You have GOT to stop thinking that way. I was dx.d as a LATE STAGE Lung Cancer patient and Here I Am 11 years later. You have GOT to get a grip and we are here to help you do that. Sweetie, this crap can be beat. HONEST!! We are here for you. Please hear me when I say this is treatable!

((((((((URSOL, NOT))))))))))

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Hi Lillian,

I understand your reaction to that horrible news, but this is important.. like Connie said it is not a death sentence. There is so many different treatments out there now. There are so many people on here who were diaagnosed with stage III and IV who are doing so well years later. DO NOT LISTEN TO STASTISTICS!!

You have to keep a positive attitude and know that you can beat this. We are here to help you along the way.

Please keep us posted on all that is going on.

Again... Never give up.... faith has moved many a mountain.

Maryanne :wink:

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Welcome Lillian.

Please take a breath and some time to regroup. We all have been in your same shoes. But there is a lot that can be done. First of all get all your facts and then get informed. Get your attitude in gear and come here for us to help you along this road. Update us when you get more info. In the meantime.........check out the stories and posts that can inspire and give you hope.

Kasey

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Deep breaths, try not to panic. Very easy for us all to say calm down, we've been there too but now we know that this is a very survival disease.

The unkown is very scary and LC has a very bad reputation but so many people on this board alone have proven that it is managable and even beatable so don't give up before you know what you're fighting.

We're all here for you and understand just how you feel.

Take care

Geri

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Hold the boat!!! Do not think of this as the end or anything. Just the beginning. Go and read survivors and good news forums and tell me this is over. You are astarting on something that will change your life not end it. there are a lot of options for you. Read these forums before you see your Dr. ou have a bit of alliances from this group in the New England region. There are a lot of options for you right now. When you can find out what type of cancer you have or if you just have nodules. Maybe nothing serious. Maybe something serious. Go to Dr.s apptmnt and take an Organizer purse size. Write down everything in this journal including questiions for Onc Dr. Play nurse for the Dr and get all the info you can about what you have and how they will treat it. Get back to us with that info. Scream Cry Yell and be afraid now becvuse when you leave the Dr.s office the fight is on. And we are in your corner to help you win the battle. Sending prayers for comfort and healing. GET REEADY TO RUMBLE!!!!! :wink:

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Hi,

Please don't jump the gun. Go to the doctor with someone so that you can get all the information. I remember half listening because I was so upset. That's normal. That was also 4 years ago! Take it one step at a time and keep posting here. We can help you get thru this, promise.

Joanie

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Hi Lillian,

Your life has taken a new turn. It will never be the same. Are you ready for a change? Even if you aren't ready, get ready, there girl!

I agree with Frank. These days are the toughest part of the whole experience. There was a very ominous black cloud that couldn't be shaken for me. Ativan helped with that. (love that Ativan!)

Get someone in your corner whose eyes and ears are more open than yours. Right now it is hard to hear everything being said.

I promise that you are going to be able to do this, even though right now it may feel as if you can't. It is a whole 'nother experience; it is nothing like you have ever been through.

I am out 3 1/2 years from a later stage lc with no recurrence. I decided early on that I was going to beat this thing. I did everything in my power to wrastle this beast. There is a good article by Richard Bloch if you come across it, read it. He says there are 6 things that will assure success in treating cancer. One is the treatment. Two is the treatment. Three is the treatment. Four and Five is the treatment. And Six is the attitude.

Right now it is imperative that you learn everything about your disease and the treatment options for yourself. Then you will have most all of the 6 accomplished.

Then stick with us for that attitude. We will help to keep your attitude in a good place!

Glad you found us...

Cindi o'h

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Hi Lillian,

Everyone has given you such good advice. Please listen to them and give yourself time to adjust to the news you've just received and then get ready to fight. My Mother was diagnosed with late stage lung cancer and is still here as a perfect example that you can beat it!!!! You, too can DO THIS!

Warm Hugs,

Melinda

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Hello Lillian

I am so terribly sorry you are going through this. LC is a hard battle, but one that can be won. And you are so young too. That is actually an advantage, you can tolerate more aggressive treatments than many can. You are strong and healthy otherwise and can take more potent steps such as adjunctive chemo following surgery to increase odds of no reoccurance.

The fact that you have been recommended for surgery is in itself a blessing. Do you know they only recommend surgery if they feel they can cure the disease? My husband wasn't given the option for surgery, we wish he could have.

The surgery is very difficult, but you can do this and you can be cured. You WILL see your baby's 1st birthday, just like you will see his 18th and 30th etc...

I know how hard a blow this is to you. I remember all too well the fear and devastation that word cancer has and those first days where all I did was cry. Please don't give that word more power than it deserves though, don't let it steal your hope and your will. The fastest way to lose this battle is to give up. Don't give up.

We are in your corner and here for whatever you need. There are literally thousands of people on this site with unimaginable amounts of experience and knowledge on treatments and medications. We have people here who do tons of research on the latest and greatest things out there to win this fight (RandyW is one of him, and you will probably hear from him soon), and you now have over 3000 people who understand what you are going through, who are praying for you and are hear to listen as you vent, scream, get angry, and will still be here when you come back rejoicing and celebrating your success.

You are in my prayers, and I know God will pull you through this. I pray for you to find comfort and strength for this journey.

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I so know how you feel, and I'm so sorry, but trust me when I say that you will recover from this shock. You learn to live with it, but fight it at the same time.

Nobody, not even a healthy person, knows how much time they have. There are so many treatments that are available, and cure or "stable disease" is a very real possibility--just look at all the people here!

When I started reading about my own disease, the statistics said that the average person lives only about 12 months from diagnosis, and I'm still here 15 months later with, currently, no evidence of disease!

You're here, you're kids are too, so take it one day at a time. Be hopeful--you have every reason to be.

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Lillian,

I am so, so sorry to hear your news. Don't jump the gun on "time" just yet, as there is so much that can be done, and so much that you still don't know. I know things with my dad got much better when we got him onto antidepressants, as having cancer is depressing...there is no way around that.

God bless you Lillian. I will pray for you and for your family.

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We can all relate to where you are right now!!!

I was on Paxil (anti-depressent), Buspar (anti-anxiety), and ativan for those over the top moments. do not think yourself weak if you turn to medication. I won't leave home without mine :wink: I am only on a mild anti-depressent now.

What really helped me immensely with each of my diagnosis was books and tapes by Dr. Bernie Siegel. The first one I read was "Love, medicine and miracles". You can order mediation tapes through amazon.com by him as well. I had one on going into pre-op.

One step, one step, one step. All you have to do. And remember, NO ONe has any guarantees on life expectencies. NO ONE AT ALL.

gail

PS See my picture with my son? He was 7 when i had my first breast cancer. He is now 20.

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Welcome Lillian.

That is a beautiful name, my mother is also named Lillian. I sent you a PM but I still wanted to give you another hello. I read your post with such anguish as two months ago I was standing in your shoes. I can tell you this, it does get better. At first you can't eat, or sleep, and you do a lot of crying. You've read the statistics online and you wonder not are you going to die, but when. These are all normal responses and every single person on this website has experienced them, whether for themselves or for a loved one. Use their knowledge and support, lean on them, they will help you through.

I will pray that you are a candidate for surgery and that this disease might be taken away from you. But remember that if that is not possible all is not lost. There are treatment options out there, and there are many survivors. You are young and healthy, and that will go a long way in your favor. You must begin to believe that you will be a survivor, you are not a statistic. You must believe that you will live to see your childrens birthdays.

For now concentrate on getting the best dr. and the best treatment. Once you have a plan you will feel empowered, and your fighting spirit will kick in, and you will begin to kick the living daylights out of this thing!

Prayers for you and your family.

Tracy.

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Lillian:

First, welcome to this site -- as you can see, we are a group of well-informed, passionate people (both LC patients and their caregivers) who can offer a lot of help and support to you as you navigate through this journey.

Don't believe the statistics for one minute: the statistics (if I remember this right) are based on the state of treatment options and medical understanding of the disease from over 5 years ago. Things have changed A LOT since then. Even at that time, many, many people were, and still are, surviving this diagnosis and thriving in their "new" lives! Cancer is better viewed as something to be managed, rather than a death sentence, so chin up sweetie!!

Inner strength, being well-rested, and tenacity will be important. Won't hurt to ask your doctor for Rx help with the depression if you find you need it -- many have found it very beneficial in order to navigate through the ups and downs of learning what this "new normal" is like.

As others have mentioned already, wouldn't hurt if you have someone who can attend doctor visits with you -- an extra set of eyes and ears at visits (and help ask questions) can help tremendously as you get your bearings with this.

As soon as you know what kind of LC it is, what your "staging" is, and what treatment course you and the doctors pursue, please let us know so we can help you better along the way.

Hugs,

Linda

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Lillian,

I know that you must be feeling so overwhelmed, and of course with 3 little ones it makes it even harder, but your children are also a cause for your strength as well. I know it is easy to panic, and be in disbelief, but you will learn more about what is going on with you, and now that you are here there are many people who will educate and help you in your journey, and yes, it is a journey, but know that. You are alot stronger than you give yourself credit for. And we are here for you.

Grace

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Lillian,

You have gotten wonderful advice and know that you are in my prayers..deep breath, ok and try to take things one step at a time..heck, one second at a time if it helps!

The stats are *old news* so please don't pay any attention to them.

God Bless you and we are here for you.

Hugs,

Libby

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Hi Lillian; Your lc is very treatable at this point. There is a chance that the biopsy will show that the nodes are ok and you may be a candidate for surgery (or maybe they will do a lobectomy while you are on the table) and have a shot at a permanent cure. But even if you can't be cured, you can be treated and hold the cancer at bay for years, perhaps have extended times of no evidence of disease.

Let us know how your biopsy/surgery turns out.

And, I think you will grow old and watch your gandchildren grow up.

As others have said, get meds for the depression. I did and it helped me.

Don M

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Hello Lillian ~

Your post brought back some memories for me of the days right after my diagnosis. Gosh, that was a scary time and I am terribly sorry you are experiencing this too. One of the most difficult parts about being a lung cancer survivor is the waiting times. Thank goodness you posted - if you have to deal with lung cancer, this is the best place to be.

The stats are so scary so I stopped reading them. I've learned that there is so much living to do while dealing with lung cancer. It's hard to be positive when your life has so dramatically changed, but after a while, it won't be so scary and confusing.

Lean on the group - we are here for you!!

With a gentle hug,

Pam in FL

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Hi Lillian,

I'm so sorry you have received this awful diagnosis. But you will survive for a long time. Treatment today is so much more advanced.

I was diagnosed just over a year ago (May 2005). Like you the shock, telling people, getting past the tears...it's tough. But then you act. I asked for a mild antidepressant immediately - just to let me think clearly enough to know what to do next. They predicted 6 mo to 1 year. Now a year later, at a cancer treatment center the won't predict other than to say a long time. I have found chemo quite tolerable and to date have been able to lead a perfectly normal life. I only find I am a little more tired and sometimes after cheno, I need an anti nausea pill or two.

You will be there for you baby's first birthday and many more!

Please hang in there and stay hopefull. I'll say a prayer for you and your family.

Mary

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Hi Lillian!

I know EXACTLY how you feel. It's incredibly scary. We've been programmed that if we ever hear the words 'You have cancer' that we are going to die. NOT TRUE! Most survivors will tell you it's all about the attitude. Our bodies are awesome machines that have the power to heal themselves. I firmly believe that.

Put on your game face for this one. Fight hard. Learn all you can. Ask your doctor a million questions. Learn learn and learn some more. The more you know, or the more your caregiver knows, the better off you are.

Don't be afraid to ask for anti-depressants either. The doc will be happy to get you started and you'll be surprised at how it will let you fight harder.

Write anytime. Ask questions. We're all here to help each other.

Much love and prayers!

Darrell

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